KbtBB Recreated - Olivia and Eisuke - Short Story 2 - Baby Scare
by Cassakane
Summary: Olivia and Eisuke have an argument that leads Olivia to question whether or not she wants a future with him.
1. The Argument

Author's Note: If you are reading the collection, Kissed by the Baddest Bidder Recreated - this short story is meant to be read after chapter 10 of Chisato + Mamoru. Please read chapters 1-4 of this story after chapter 10 of C+M and chapter 5 of this story after chapter 11 of C+M. This way you'll avoid any spoilers and read things in proper order. Or, you could just read the whole thing after chapter 11 of C+M.

I only take partial responsibility for the things characters do in this story. When they jump out of the box that I have them in and say, "I want to do this!", I have trouble putting them back in the box. I end up just letting them do whatever they want to do.

Warning: There is a small amount of domestic violence in this short story (in chapter one).

I appreciate any and all feedback, good, bad and downright mean.

I looked up over the edge of the magazine I was reading and saw Eisuke coming up the stairs to the second floor living room. Dropping the magazine onto the coffee table in front of me, I stretched, sighing happily. The edge of my red sweater dress rode up above the top of my stockings, but I didn't bother to tug it back down. I wanted the sight of my thighs to make him hot. I'd been missing him all day. I wanted to talk and snuggle and make love, in no particular order.  
As he got closer, I realized that his mouth was set in an angry slash and his eyes were full of pure fury. I wondered who - or what - was making him so mad, and whether it was going to result in a good hard fuck or if he'd be on his computer until the early morning hours. I turned towards him as he got closer to the couch, making sure that my dress rode up higher on my thighs, and gave him a big smile.  
"_Here are the vitamins you requested,"_ he spat, tossing a bag onto the couch next to me. It rattled loudly as it bounced on the cushion.  
"What's wrong with you?" I asked with a frown, looking up at him with my eyes narrowed in annoyance and putting plenty of warning in my voice. I had to be very clear about my boundaries. We'd talked about this more than once. I was all up for a vigorous fuck if something was making him mad, but he wasn't supposed to be taking his anger out on me verbally. "Throwing things isn't necessary."  
"_What's wrong with me?"_ His voice was like a sharpened blade and I sat up straighter as I realized that all of this anger might be for _me._ Before I could come up with something that I might have done to piss him off, he said, "I had the _pleasure_ of finding out that you're pregnant from a maid telling me you'd asked for prenatal vitamins. What the fuck do you think you're hiding from me, Olivia?"  
"_Oh! No!"_ I jumped up and waved my hands around as if I was trying to clear the air. The anxiety that had been building up in me was overtaken by relief and the absurdity of the situation so quickly that I almost started giggling. I came up with a lie on the spot to protect Chisato's secret. "I'm not pregnant. No worries. I just asked for these vitamins because they make your hair and nails grow. I saw a new hairstyle that I like and I want my hair to grow faster so I can get it."  
I was smiling up at him, trying not to laugh at the silly misunderstanding, expecting him to shrug and blow everything off. Instead he took two steps back, distancing himself from me as the skin around his mouth grew white and the fire in his eyes raged higher. While I blinked in confusion at his reaction, he pulled a Ziploc bag from his pocket and tossed it onto the coffee table beside me. It landed with a sharp clack. It held what could only be Chisato's pregnancy test.  
"Someone got that out of the _trash?"_ I asked, making a face. "That is so gross. This spying on me thing is _really _getting out of control."  
"You need to tell me why you're continuing to hide the fact that you're pregnant from me, _right now,"_ he demanded.  
"This is ridiculous. You don't need to get so angry. I'm _not_ pregnant-" I began, but he quickly cut me off.  
"_You've got a positive pregnancy test and a bottle of prenatal vitamins. I'm two seconds away from tearing your fucking head off. Tell me the truth immediately!" _he roared, his face growing red._  
_ "This is too crazy," I said, regretting my flippant words as I noticed Eisuke's fists clenching at his sides. He really was holding himself back. "_Yes_, I took a pregnancy test. I was a couple of days late and I got antsy. I'm _not_ pregnant, but thinking about being pregnant reminded me of how great the vitamins are for your skin and hair. So I went ahead and asked for some."  
He stepped towards me, bent to grab a pillow off the couch and threw it with all his strength across the room. I watched it bounce harmlessly off a wall. "The test is _positive."  
_ "All of those tests read positive after ten minutes," I explained, annoyed that we were even having this conversation. I picked my phone up off the coffee table. "I'm gonna call and have the Run Room send up another test. I'll take it in front of you. _I am not pregnant."  
_ "_I'm going to wring your fucking neck!"_ he shouted.  
"_For what?!" _I yelled. I was starting to get angry because he was too pig-headed to listen to me. "For _not_ being pregnant? We should be doing a happy dance!"  
"Is that what you were thinking when you took that test? That you didn't want to have my child?" he accused. He stepped forward and slapped my phone out of my hands. It fell to the floor with a thud. "Is that why you didn't even bother to tell me it was a possibility?"  
"_What the fuck?! _This is insane. _You're_ insane. You just keep making things up! Someone like you should definitely not have children. You'd make a terrible father!" I regretted the words as soon as I said them, but it was too late. They'd already left my mouth and I was too angry to apologize.  
He took a step closer and I jumped back to avoid him, bumping into the couch and nearly losing my balance. The bottle of vitamins tipped out of the bag, tumbled to the floor and rolled under the coffee table. I jerked myself upright as I found my balance and scurried around the table to put it between us.  
"_You need to calm down! You shouldn't be so mad and scary and acting like you're going to hurt me over a misunderstanding! This is so stupid!"_ I shouted at him. He came around the table, stalking me like a tiger. I backed up quickly, trying to maintain the distance between us, but unwilling to turn around and run because I didn't want to take my eyes off of him. As he gained on me, I shouted, "_Stay away from me!"_  
I should have known better than to tell him what to do. He suddenly shot forward and grabbed me by the upper arms before I had a chance to react and try to avoid him. He gave me a little shake and yelled, "_You said I'd be a terrible father!"_  
"You're either cold or angry or ready to fuck. _You only have three modes!_ Where is there a father in there?" I demanded. I was suddenly feeling suffocated. All that I could think about was how much I wanted to get away from him. I pushed against his chest, struggling to get out of his hold. "_Let go of me!"  
_ He responded by gripping my arms harder and shaking me again. This time it hurt. My self defense lessons kicked in. I went from helpless girlfriend to total badass in the blink of an eye, my body quickly going through motions that I'd practiced hundreds of times. Using my left hand, I struck his left wrist while stepping back to throw him off balance. He let go of my right arm when I hit his wrist and I immediately used my free hand to hit him hard in the side of the head. Probably too hard. I was used to practicing on someone who was wearing padding and using full force. I hadn't held back when I hit him.  
I also didn't hold back when I followed through with the last step and kneed him between the legs with all my strength. The entire sequence only took a few seconds. When it was finished Eisuke sat on the ground looking up at me, pain and confusion mixing in with his rage.  
"Stay away from me," I said, breathless as panic began to overwhelm my anger. "_Just stay away from me."  
_ I spun on my heel, ran around the coffee table to snatch up my phone from the floor and fled down the stairs. By the time I made it to the front door, he'd roared my name twice. The sound echoed through the penthouse, but I didn't stop or slow down.

Luckily, the elevator was still sitting at the penthouse. If I'd had to wait for it to come back up from another floor, I never would have escaped. I jumped inside and pounded the button to close the doors and hit the button for the lobby. All the while picturing the guards in their little room reacting in surprise as they'd watched me run through the great room and then jumping up and chasing after me.  
If they really were chasing after me, they were too late. The doors were closed and the elevator was sinking down, slipping past floor after floor on its way to the lobby. I knew better than to let it get there. The penthouse guards were certainly calling the guard posted at the security cage for the elevator in the lobby, telling him to stop me. Just as the elevator passed the fifth floor, I hit the button for the third floor and jumped out as soon as the doors slid open. I'd worked in the hotel for months, I'd been all over its public and private spaces since I began dating Eisuke. No one was going to be able to stop me.  
But I had to move quickly. They wouldn't be able to guess for sure where I was going, but if they thought to turn off my security access, I'd be fucked. I ran down a hallway on the third floor and slammed through the door to the stairwell, flying down the stairs as quickly as I could until I reached the ground floor. Seconds later I was zipping through narrow hallways that had been built for employees. I was between the catering kitchens and the casino, heading right for my destination - a nondescript door that led outside to a small grassy area next to a loading bay. There wasn't a single sign of anyone else. There was nothing to stop me.  
I felt the high of triumph as I used my thumbprint to unlock the door, crashed through it and ran across the little lawn that some employees used for breaks. The frozen grass crunched beneath my feet and the icy air chilled my lungs. I was wearing a sweater dress that ended inches above my knees and black ballet style slippers. I wasn't prepared for the harsh cold, but I ignored it, crossing the street that was used by delivery trucks and entering the little neighborhood that sat behind the hotel.  
I knew that I needed to avoid the convenience store where Baba worked, just in case he was in there. I had no idea how likely he would be to see me, recognize me and chase after me, but I couldn't take any chances. I chose another street and headed towards a club that catered to hotel employees. I knew that I'd find a taxi or two waiting outside the club, even though it was only around eight o'clock.  
I threw myself into the first taxi and told the driver to go ahead and start driving while I pulled out my phone. I was sweaty and totally out of breath. The driver looked at me with raised eyebrows in the rearview mirror, but did as I asked. I scrolled through my contacts and found Sakiko's address. After giving it to the driver, I collapsed back against the seat and took deep breaths, trying to get my breathing to slow down. I was not going to cry. I wasn't in the wrong. Eisuke had made crazy accusations, he hadn't listened to me and he'd put his hands on me.  
I hoped that I hadn't hurt him too badly. I could still see him sitting on the floor, filled with rage and pain. But he should have known better than to hurt me. I wasn't taking all those self defense classes for nothing. I wasn't going to let anyone manhandle me ever again, not even him.

When I got out of the taxi in front of Sakiko's apartment building, a man in plain clothes loitering near the door stared at me. Without taking his eyes off of me, he pulled his phone from his pocket and raised it up to make a call. It was one of the guards that had been posted at Sakiko's building due to the trouble with Shin Aida. I ignored him and hurried into the building. I'd warmed up in the taxi and wasn't going to linger in the frigid air without a coat.  
Upstairs, the guard standing outside Sakiko's door was obviously expecting me. "Good evening, Ma'am," he said, giving me a little bow.  
"Hey. Is she in?" I asked.  
"No," he said. "Not yet. I'm not sure if she's coming home tonight."  
"Let me in," I said, keeping my voice level and commanding, not showing any hesitation or nervousness. I was the boss's girlfriend. I outranked this man.  
I contained a yelp of victory as the man said, "Yes, Ma'am," and turned to punch in the passcode for the apartment.  
Once inside I stood looking around and was surprised to feel relief and a sense of freedom washing over me. I was out of the penthouse. There was a guard outside the door, but there was no one in the apartment. No one was watching me, no one was listening to what I said, there was no one to report my movements to Eisuke. No one was going through my trash. This was going to be like being on vacation.  
I sent Sakiko a text, letting her know that I was at her apartment and making myself at home. She'd made out with Mei on the couch in the great room of the penthouse, I felt that justified my giving myself a tour of her place and helping myself to a pair of yoga pants and a long sleeved tshirt.  
It had been months since I'd had on a pair of pants. My legs didn't even know what to do. Eisuke wanted me in short skirts at all times so that he could see my legs. It was a requirement that I'd never tried to fight. I _wanted_ him looking at my legs, but it was nice to put those pants on, nice to feel a little bit like my old self again.

I was lounging on Sakiko's couch, eating crackers and drinking tea that I'd found in her kitchen, when she came home. She hurried over to me and said, "What's going on? What are you doing here? You left the penthouse without your guards?"  
I sat up to give her room to sit down next to me on the couch and said, "Eisuke and I had a huge fight. I just ran out."  
"What did he do?" she asked, anger leaking into her voice. She didn't like Eisuke, or at least she didn't like the two of us in a relationship. She didn't think he treated me well enough.  
I stared at her. There was really nothing I could tell her. I'd promised Chisato that I wouldn't tell anyone she was pregnant and there was no way that I could tell Sakiko that Eisuke and I had engaged in some hand to hand combat. She'd flip out for sure, even though I'd been the victor.  
"We just had an argument. It was all based on a misunderstanding," I said evasively. "I really don't want to talk about it."  
"Are you fucking kidding me? It was so bad that you can't even tell me what happened?" she snapped. Her eyes flew over me, taking in the clothes that I'd changed into. "Is that why you changed your clothes? Did he leave bruises on you?"  
"No!" I cried. "That's ridiculous. You know I'm not allowed to wear pants around Eisuke. I just wanted to put on some pants."  
"'_Not allowed to wear pants'_," she repeated angrily. "He's a controlling abusive bastard. Take off those clothes and show me he didn't leave any marks on you."  
"I am not taking my clothes off!" I said, not sure if I should laugh or get mad. I also wasn't sure that he hadn't left any marks on my upper arms. "You're crazy. You'll just have to believe me. Eisuke did not beat me up."  
"I don't trust that mother fucker at all! It pisses me off so bad that he did something so wrong that you had to run away from home," she cried.  
"It's not like you could do anything even if he did hit me," I pointed out, trying to distract her from the topic of the argument between Eisuke and I. "What're you going to do, go kick his ass?"  
"I'd figure out something," she muttered and looked me over again. "What are you doing exactly? Waiting for him to apologize?"  
"No… I guess I'm taking time to think about things," I said. "But I really haven't thought of anything at all. I've just been watching tv and trying not to think."  
"Are you going to break up with him? Is that what you're trying to decide?" she asked a little too hopefully.  
"No, that's not it." I let my head fall back against the couch as the thoughts I'd been avoiding rushed in. "It's not like I need to decide if I want to break up with him. I need to decide if I want a future with him. Things just got a little too real today. I realized there's a lot of stuff that I've never even really thought about."  
She looked at me, quietly reading my expression for a few moments before saying, "Alright. I'm here whenever you want to talk about it. Are you hungry? I'm going to make some fried rice."  
"Yeah," I said. "I could eat."  
While Sakiko started prepping food in the kitchen, I was caught up in replaying the argument. I hadn't had much time to feel angry while Eisuke was throwing his accusations at me. I'd just been reacting and trying to defend myself. Now, anger began to boil inside of me and I decided to just let it out.  
I grabbed a pillow and smacked it down hard on Sakiko's couch. Who did he think he was, already angry, not even bothering to talk to me first, just assuming the worst? "Fucking bastard," I muttered, punching my fist into the pillow and then the couch cushion. I liked the way that it felt, so I did it a few more times. He'd thrown his accusations at me and then hadn't even really bothered to listen to my side of things. I'd been judged and found guilty just because his little spies had pulled some evidence out of a trash can.  
I was practically locked in the hotel. Especially with the Shin Aida problem, I never really got to leave. It was a huge pain in the ass to be followed by a security team while doing something simple like going shopping or to a restaurant. I really never even bothered. Even when I hadn't needed the extra guards, I'd mostly only left the hotel when I was with Eisuke. I was basically in a Tres Spades snow globe. Trapped, watched and spied on. And still, he had the nerve to doubt me.  
I pictured him sitting on the floor after I kneed him in the balls. This time I felt satisfaction. He'd deserved it. Putting his hands on me after everything that I'd give up for him. I punched the couch with both fists now, over and over, yelling insults at the pillow. I loved him and I fucking put up with him. He should be kissing my goddamned ass, not looking for reasons to be mad at me.  
Sakiko kept quietly working on the fried rice while I attacked her couch. I wished that I was stronger, strong enough to dig my fingernails into the thick fabric and tear it open. I wanted to pull out the stuffing and throw it around the room. What the fuck did Eisuke think he was doing? He was supposed to love me. He was supposed to trust me. He was supposed to listen to me and hold me dear.  
Why did he have to be so fucking difficult? Just interacting with him daily was a chore. I had to be on my guard, watch his mood, be sure not to say or do the wrong thing. I had to be tough-skinned and not allow the stupid things he said to affect me.  
What the fuck did he think he was doing making me doubt him? Making me doubt our relationship? It was the most important thing to me. I didn't want to see flaws. I didn't want to see warning signs. I wanted to trust in him and trust in us. I wanted to feel safe and content. What was he doing, making me question everything?  
"_Stupid asshole,"_ I cried, scratching at the couch cushion as if I really could tear it open. "_I'm going to fucking kill you."_


	2. Acting Out

_**Sakiko **_

"What do you have to tell me?" Eisuke asked, glaring at me over his laptop.  
He looked like shit. He must not have gotten any sleep because Olivia had left. He had his usual flawless hairstyle and immaculate suit, but his face was strained, his eyes weary. It filled me with satisfaction. I hoped that he was scared shitless that she'd leave him. I wanted him to be wracked with guilt for whatever he'd done. He couldn't hide the fact that he was tired but he hid his emotions and thoughts just as well as he always had. I'd have loved to get a glimpse of them, to see his misery.  
"Not a lot," I said bluntly. I knew he wouldn't like that, but I didn't like standing in front of his desk giving my report. I wanted to turn every fucking screw that I could possibly find. The more that I could add to his pain, the better. "She's making herself at home in my apartment. She says she needs time to think. I stayed at Soryu's last night, so I haven't seen her yet today. I'll go back this evening and talk to her."  
"What does she even need to think about?" he asked, his tone was as cold as usual but the question revealed just how cranky he was feeling.  
Normally I'd have told him the answer to that question was Olivia's business, but as his employee I was expected to tell him everything, even if it meant ratting out my friend. Usually that pissed me off, this time I was happy to make him squirm. "Whether she wants a future that includes you."  
If looks could kill, my head would have exploded. "The argument we had last night doesn't warrant that reaction," he said.  
"I wouldn't know. She won't tell me what you guys are fighting about," I replied with a carefree shrug. "But whatever it is, it was enough to make her run away. Now it's up to her to decide whether she wants to come back."  
He stared at me. He hated me and I knew it. He always looked at me like he'd gladly flick me off the face of the earth, like an annoying bug. I was sure it hadn't always been like that. He hadn't really paid much attention to me when I was just another employee in his underground organization and Olivia's friend. It wasn't until the night that I'd been kidnapped that he'd started looking at me differently. Was it because he'd had to kill a man because of me? Or was it because I'd fucked Soryu on the hood of one of his cars and damaged his precious import?  
The memory made me miss Soryu. I wanted to be with him, not standing in front of Eisuke having this ridiculous conversation. Any other man in the world would have to deal with his pissed off girlfriend himself. Only Eisuke was getting secret reports and trying to manipulate things from the sidelines. He probably thought it made him cool and powerful, like a chess master. I thought it made him look weak. Why didn't he just call or text Olivia or go see her at my apartment? Why didn't he try to work things out like a normal human being?  
"She'll be coming back," he said, as if his words were the final say. "You make sure of it."  
"How the fuck am I supposed to do that?" I snapped. "It's Olivia's decision."  
"Don't pretend like you don't have any influence. I know you," he said, narrowing his eyes at me. "You're encouraging her to leave me, pushing her in the wrong direction."  
I shrugged. "It's my job as her friend to give her good advice."  
"It's your job as my employee to do what you're fucking told." There was a little fire in his eyes now.  
"Maybe I should stop working for you," I said, the idea crossing my mind for the first time. It wasn't like I needed the job as the manager and dealer for the midnight card games or the position in his underground organization. I was also working at Ice Dragons headquarters. Soryu would expand my role and give me a raise if I asked. Hell, he'd just pay for everything I wanted if I said I didn't want to work at all.  
"You think about that," he said. "I wouldn't be responsible for your safety if you weren't one of my operatives."  
He said the words like they were a threat, like he'd turn his back if I were in danger if I wasn't working for him. "Let's not pretend like you could brush me aside if I wasn't working for you. I'm Soryu's girlfriend. You'd take care of me the same as he'd take care of Olivia."  
"Continue working for me," he said, as if he could make the decision for me. "I like you better under my thumb."  
My heart revolted at his words, but my brain was smarter than that. I'd have more connections, information and power if I kept working for him. I wasn't going to give that up and be left in the lesser role of Soryu's girlfriend. I couldn't stand to be pushed to the side. "You can picture me wherever you want," I retorted. "I'll do what I can with Olivia, but I'm not making any promises. Whatever you did, she's fucking pissed about it."  
"Get out of here," he said, letting his guard slip. "I don't want to look at you anymore."

When I let myself into my apartment, music was blaring and Olivia was dancing wildly around the living room. She stopped with a jolt when she noticed me in the entryway and went to turn off the music.  
"What are you doing?" I asked. "And what are you _wearing_?"  
She'd paired a bright orange ruffled blouse with snowman patterned leggings. She tugged at the edge of the blouse and gave a smile that was half embarrassed, half proud. "I'm enjoying my freedom," she declared. Her words were defiant, but her face had been ravaged by tears. She'd obviously been doing a hell of a lot of crying. "I like this shirt and I like these leggings. Why can't I wear them together?"  
"I guess you're enjoying it," I said with a little laugh. She looked like hell. Her eyes were red, her face was puffy and she hadn't even combed her hair. "Did you forget how to do your own hair and makeup?"  
"_Who the fuck cares?"_ she crowed, throwing her arms up in triumph. "_I am alone._ There's nobody to see me and judge me. Nobody to try to impress."  
She came over and gave me a sloppy hug, hanging on my like a ragdoll. "You're here, but you have to love me no matter what."  
"Have you been drinking?" I asked, pulling away from her and looking her over again.  
"Nope. Not a thing," she replied. "I'm just going a little crazy."  
"Why don't you tell me what's going on before I start feeling the need to call in some men with a straight jacket to cart you away," I suggested, walking over to take a seat on the couch. "They'd take one look at that outfit and lock you up for life without any questions."  
She plopped down on the couch and turned to face me, really meeting my eyes for the first time since I'd arrived. Her eyes were filled with so much despair and fear that I reached out a hand and set it on her shoulder without even thinking. "Have you ever thought about what we're going to do when we have kids?" she asked.  
The question was important to her, even though it made no sense to me. She looked like she was about to cry. I spoke softly, treading carefully, trying not to say the wrong thing. "No. I never planned on being in a serious relationship. I've never thought about having kids. I guess I always assumed that I wouldn't."  
"When Eisuke and I first became official, I didn't think it would last long," she said. "I figured it wouldn't be long before he was ready to move on to bigger fish and by that time I'd be fed up with him. But that's not what's happening."  
"I didn't know that. You just expected that he was going to break up with you?" I asked, finding one more reason to dislike him.  
"Yeah, but that's not what's happening. It's more like we're going to stay together forever." Her words were tentative, as if she couldn't quite believe them herself.  
"Even though you ran away last night and you're thinking about breaking up with him?" I tried to make sense of what she was saying. "What does that have to do with having kids? Eisuke doesn't want any? Is that what you fought about?"  
"That's not it. Our argument wasn't about kids, but it got me thinking about the future," she explained. "If I have kids, they're going to be locked in the penthouse and kept under guard all the time. They won't be able to have a normal life at all. The same goes for you if you have kids with Soryu."  
My head jerked back a bit, my body trying to flee from the idea. "I'm just trying to deal with the present right now. I never even think about the future or kids."  
"But if you stay with Soryu, he's gonna want kids," she pressed and I had no choice but to nod in agreement. "Is it wrong to have kids if you know they're going to be prisoners? If they're going to be in danger? What if they get kidnapped? What if some enemy hurts them? What would I do if something happened to my child?"  
"I see what you mean," I said. "But kids do grow up like that. Soryu did and Mei…"  
"Mei? I do not want my kids growing up as fucked up as Mei," she said, making a disgusted face. "That's an argument for running and never looking back."  
"There's no way your kids would be like Mei. It doesn't matter where you are, you'll be a good mom," I assured her. "But I have to be completely honest. Soryu's father had a lot of mistresses and so he has a lot of half brothers and sisters. Some of them have been kidnapped and killed."  
"Oh god," she said, shaking her head. "That's terrible. I can't have that. I just can't keep blindly walking forward and not think about this stuff. I feel like I should turn back. If I try, maybe I can forget about Eisuke and have a normal life with someone else."  
"I don't think you can do that," I said. Her eyes were brimming with tears. "I may not like it, but you are totally in love with him. How are you going to leave him? Isn't it better to talk to him and see what he says about having kids? I know he'll make sure there's a brilliant plan to keep your kids safe."  
"You're just saying that because he told you to convince me to go back to him," she said, smiling to take the sting out of her accusation.  
"Of course he did," I admitted. "But, even if he hadn't… It's one thing to break up when your relationship just isn't working anymore, but that isn't what you're talking about. You're talking about leaving him when everything is going well. I think that will make it almost impossible for you to get over him. You're not going to have any reasons to hate him, only reasons to miss him. You'll end up living a life full of regrets."  
"Staying with him means accepting that my children and I are going to live locked up and under guard. That our lives will be in danger. I just don't know if I'm ready to say that's okay," she said.  
"I understand what you're saying, but tons of rich and famous people live like that," I pointed out. "Think of all the guests we've seen in the hotel who were being followed by their security team."  
"I was working on the lower floors where the normal people stayed," she reminded me. "But I know what you're saying. Does that mean you're going to be totally fine with marrying Soryu and having kids in that situation?"  
"Soryu and I have never talked about getting married…" I said and tried to picture it. Soryu and I with a couple of kids, a few guards in the periphery. It made my heart beat hard in my chest. I spoke with sudden conviction. "But it doesn't matter. I belong with Soryu. We'll take care of our lives and our children the best we can. That's all anyone can do."  
"I wish I could decide things so easily," she said, her voice pained.  
"Can you picture yourself married to some random office worker, surrounded by his kids? Can you be happy like that?" I asked.  
"Not everyone gets to be with the one they love the most," she argued. "There are tons of people out there with their second or third choice. That's totally normal."  
"Are you trying to convince me that it isn't okay to have kids or that it's okay to break up with Eisuke?" I asked. "If you want to break up with him, break up with him. You don't have to have a good reason. You just do it."  
"I can't," she said. "I feel like I'm stuck and I don't know which way to turn. It seems like whatever I decide, it's going to be the wrong choice."  
"Then you take your time," I said. "You just stay here and think about it until you're at least reasonably happy with your decision. Eisuke can wait, everything else can wait. Just take your time."  
"Thanks," she said. "I might stay forever since you have such cute clothes."  
I laughed and stood up off the couch. "I don't know if I'll ever be able to wear that shirt again after seeing it with those leggings. I think we should have a drink. You want an oolong-hai?"

"You know you're gonna go back to him," I said bluntly, testing the water, watching her eyes for her reaction. Our glasses were almost empty and we'd been talking about nothing important for the last half hour.  
She looked down at her glass and then back up at me with a frown. "I just don't like how much I have to give up to stay with him," she said. "I have to give up so much and he gets to keep everything."  
"But you get stuff, too," I countered. "You got a great new job and you can buy whatever you want. You also never have to comb your own hair."  
"Is that how much my freedom costs?" she asked. "Does it make me seem spoiled? He gives me everything I want but I'm being a bitch because I can't go wherever I want to go, whenever I want?"  
"I don't think you're being a bitch," I said. "I think you just need to figure out what's going to make you happy. And whatever that is, you're just going to have to accept it."

She moved to put her glass down on the coffee table and then leaned towards me, her eyes serious. "Right now, I want to have sex with you."  
"_What?!"_ I jumped back instinctively, hitting my back a little too hard against the arm of the couch. It was the first time in my life that I was shocked by an invitation to fuck. I hadn't even seen it coming. I rubbed my back and glared at her. "What in the hell are you talking about? That is wrong in _so many ways. _I can't even count."  
"Why?" She was staring at me with big eyes. She shrugged and said, "What could be wrong with it? You once said Soryu promised you an open relationship. Maybe it's time you jumped through that open door."  
She gave me a sexy look that came off only a little awkward and I closed my eyes to shield myself from it. She had to be fucking batshit crazy. There was no way I was going to let her seduce me. Just the idea was both laughable and terrifying.  
"First of all," I held up a finger as I began numbering my points. "I don't even know where this is coming from. We were talking about your relationship with Eisuke. Where is my sweet innocent Olivia that used to clean rooms in the hotel? What has Eisuke done to you? Has he completely corrupted you?"  
"It's not like I was a virgin before I met Eisuke," she said with a pout. "I wasn't completely innocent and Eisuke didn't do anything to corrupt me. He just...let me find a new side of myself."  
"_You were a fluffy little lamb,"_ I insisted. "There's no way you would have even thought about having sex with me. I would have seduced you a long time ago if it had been possible."  
"Well, maybe you should have tried," she said. "I might have surprised you."  
"Not possible," I said. "You were innocent then. You're corrupted now. End of story."  
"Well, if I'm corrupted, it's your fault." Her face softened as she went from arguing mode to seductress. "You have no idea how many times I've watched that security video of you and Mei on the couch. It completely blew my mind. When I first saw it, I was like, '_This is what two girls do? It looks amazing! Why didn't Sakiko ever do that with me?' _I was so jealous of Mei, and it's always killed me wondering what the two of you did when you went into Soryu's apartment."  
"If I touch you, Eisuke will kill me." I didn't need to make any points other than that one. That one trumped them all.  
"Whatever. You let me deal with Eisuke," she said, rolling her eyes and shrugging her shoulders as if he wasn't dangerous at all. "We're on a break."  
"_You're on a break?"_ I shook my head at her. "You walked out after an argument. That isn't a break. A break is a thing that you agree upon and define. This is definitely cheating."  
She was back to glaring at me. "Why are you suddenly on Eisuke's side? You _hate _him."  
"I'm not on his side, I just don't want to be killed for touching you. And I don't hate him exactly. I just don't trust him and I don't think he treats you right," I explained. The words sounded lame even to my own ears.  
"Listen. I'm dealing with this whole thing and trying to decide how I'm going to spend the rest of my life. You're right, I don't think I'm going to be able to leave him," she admitted. "If I go back, I'm going to be locking myself in that cage and throwing away the key. I'll be giving up a ton of things that are part of a normal life. If I don't do it now, I'll never know what it's like to have sex with a woman. This is my last chance."  
"Having a same sex experience is not what most people call normal," I pointed out, even though I knew it was a thin argument.  
"It's what I want," she said and then her eyes flashed with mischief. "If you don't want to do it, I'll just ask Mei."  
Anger flashed through me. "You wouldn't."  
"Why not?" she asked. "Mei will definitely do it and she isn't afraid of Eisuke _at all."_  
"Jesus Christ," I muttered. She'd backed me into a corner. The thought of Mei touching her filled me with disgust, but it was only the night before that I'd decided I was ready to start fucking other people. Olivia asking for this...it was just too soon. I should be thinking about this change, letting it simmer a little before I made any moves. And I should probably talk to Soryu about it, let him know what I was thinking, what I intended… But it was just too hard to think. She was too pretty, too tempting, too available. I didn't really have any experience with controlling myself. When opportunities to fuck popped up, I fucked.  
It was simple, clean and easy. My body and a part of my mind were trying to push me back onto that old track. See, fuck, run. It had worked so well in the past, but now my life was much more complicated. This was Olivia, my friend, my boss's girlfriend. She was beautiful. I would have jumped at the chance to do her in the past. I wouldn't have hesitated for a single second, but things were different now.  
There was no longer the possibility to fuck and _run_. There'd be a tangled mess to deal with when the sun came up. Eisuke, Soryu and the friendship between Olivia and I. I'd never fucked a friend before. I'd never really had a friend before. I'd never let myself be entangled with anyone to that degree. Those connections of friendship made this all the more complicated. I understood what she wanted and why she wanted it, and I wanted to give it to her. It wasn't just about me getting off like it would have been in the past.  
The fact that I cared about her made everything different. I saw the emotions in her eyes - need, hope, uncertainty, excitement, desire - and they _meant_ something to me. They weren't just bits of information that I could manipulate to get what I wanted. They tugged at me, trying to draw me near. They made promises that sex with her would be better than it had been with other women because we had that connection of friendship.  
It was true, I knew it now. My relationship with Soryu had taught me all about how emotions colored the physical. Fucking Olivia would be a chance to explore that further, one that I wouldn't find elsewhere. I may have decided to fuck other people, but I'd never develop feelings for them, they'd be the same emotionless fucks that I'd always had in the past. Olivia was the only one that it could possibly be different with.  
I knew that thinking about it was a waste of time. The decision was made as soon as she spoke the words aloud. I couldn't say no to her and I had no experience with denying myself. Her skin called to me to touch it, her lips begged to be tasted. I'd have seduced her last year when we were both nothing but Tres Spades grunts, but it wouldn't have been possible then. She'd been completely different, so much more innocent and on guard.  
Eisuke had changed her. She'd grown up and become much more confident. She'd also become sexier. The Olivia I'd known before would never have watched a video of two women making out, let alone one that featured women who she actually knew. She'd have been too embarrassed, too flustered. Eisuke had done this to her and it was only fair that he paid the price for what he'd done.

"Okay, then. I give up," I said with a sigh. "There's no way I'm letting you do it with Mei. Even Eisuke will have to agree that I'm the better choice."  
"That's right. Maybe we should take some pictures or make a video? I've heard guys like girl on girl action," Olivia said excitedly. "Maybe Eisuke would like to watch a video of us. I know I would."  
"_No,"_ I said, sure that a video would make Eisuke go ballistic. "Absolutely not."  
"Whatever." Olivia tossed her head and moved towards me on the couch. "Maybe next time."  
"There won't be a next time," I said firmly. "This is a one time thing."  
"Then we'd better make the most of it. I want to start out here on the couch and then go back to the bed," she said. We'd obviously be reenacting whatever fantasies she'd imagined after watching the video of Mei and I. She moved closer and brushed her lips against mine, her tongue slipped out and lapped over my closed lips. I was tense and holding back, I'd agreed to do what she asked, but I wasn't exactly ready for it.  
"You taste good," she said, her voice low and a little dreamy. Her lips returned to mine, this time they moved firmly, pressing and sucking, her tongue teasing.  
The wall that I'd hastily put into place was crumbling fast. I parted my lips and let her in, her tongue was small and sweet, warm and eager. I felt that warmth sliding through me, relaxing my body and kindling desire. She settled a hand on my neck, her fingertips gently caressing, pulling me towards her, while her tongue explored my mouth.  
I shifted, turning towards her, silently offering my body to her. She moaned into my mouth, the sound trembling down my spine and settling in my cunt. "I thought you'd be more forceful," she said. "You were all over Mei."  
"I like this," I replied, I turned further and brought my legs up onto the couch, pushing them past her. She moved so that she lay between my thighs. "I want you to take your time, do whatever you want. When you've had enough, I'll take over."  
"Yeah, that's a good idea," she said, smiling down at me. "I definitely want to do that."  
Her lips came back to mine, a little hotter this time, a little more demanding. This was something very special. I rarely had sex with women. Lesbians were typically more interested in relationships than one night stands and it took a lot of time and effort to seduce straight girls. I'd done it, and always had fun doing it, but in the end it usually wasn't worth the work. It was far easier to find a willing dick.  
On the occasions that I had taken the time to get into a girl's pants, I'd always been the one in control, the one leading the way and pushing past every line. It felt so nice to lie back and let Olivia take the lead, to let her have her way and just enjoy what she was doing to me. She was small, soft and delicate, every single thing about her so very different from Soryu. I cradled her body between my legs, threaded my fingers through her long messy hair and enjoyed her thirsty kisses, savoring the way my body slowly heated up one degree at a time.  
When she finally pulled away from my mouth, we were both panting. Her eyes were glossy, burning with passion. "Take your shirt off," she said, sitting up on her knees to unbutton the orange blouse. I raised up to pull my shirt off and dropped it onto the floor. "Go ahead and take your bra off, too."  
I obeyed, slipping off my bra and tossing it on top of my discarded shirt, lying back to watch her. Her eyes were all over me as she rushed to push the straps of her own bra down her arms and off. "_Yes, yes, yes,"_ she chanted excitedly. "This is exactly what I wanted."  
She grabbed my wrists and pushed my arms above my head and I obliged her, crossing them behind my head and arching my chest up. She cupped my tits in her hands, testing their weight and squeezing before she traced over their curves with her fingertips and tweaked my nipples. "It's so different touching someone else's," she said. "It's making me all tingly."  
"Me too," I said, letting out a little moan as she tugged on my nipples. "It feels really good when you touch me." I was being sure to let out every little sound that wanted to escape my lips and to give her plenty of encouragement. She was my friend. There was no reason to hold anything back or play games. If this was going to be her one time with a woman, I was going to make it memorable.  
She bent down to lick one of my nipples, at first experimentally and then with increasing enthusiasm. Her fingers massaged my tit, molding and tugging as she sucked my nipple into her mouth. She set her teeth on the upper side of my nipple and caressed the lower side with her tongue, pushing it hard against the sharp edge of her teeth, making me squirm and moan.  
"That's fucking perfect," I said, catching the back of her head in my hand and holding her to my breast. She sucked hard on my nipple and then nibbled it lightly between her teeth. Heat was spreading through me, intensifying with each passing moment. I'd expected to be the one playing with Olivia's tits, the one making her cry out with pleasure. I was surprised by how much I was enjoying letting her play with my body.  
"Let's go to the bed," I said, tugging gently on her hair to get her to release my nipple. "There's not enough space to move on this couch."  
"_Yes,"_ she said, sliding up and deliberately setting her tits on mine, smashing us together as she bent down to kiss me. "I love your boobs. I already know that I'm going to miss them."  
I laughed as she pushed herself off of me and we walked down the hallway to my bedroom. Once inside she said, "Let's go ahead and take the rest of our clothes off."  
"Good idea," I answered. "Those snowman leggings aren't exactly sexy."  
We stripped off the rest of our clothes and climbed onto my bed. She was all curves and soft skin, too pretty to resist. I put a hand on her hip and moved to kiss her, sucking on her lips and pushing my tongue into her mouth this time. She kissed me back, but her hands came up to push me back down on the bed. "I'm not letting you take control." Her eyes were determined and bright with passion.  
"Are you sure?" I asked. "This is your first time."  
"I've imagined this too many times," she said. "I'm not going to stop."  
I reached up to take one of her breasts in my hand and rub my thumb over her nipple as she bent down kiss me, her lips firm and demanding. Our legs tangled together, our hips bumping and pushing against each other, seeking more pleasure. I slid my hands down her back to cup her asscheeks, holding her body to me as I adjusted my legs and rubbed my pussy against hers.  
She broke off our kiss and looked down at me, smiling as she reached down to push my thighs apart, holding my gaze as she ground herself against my cunt. "I'm going to taste you and make you come."  
"Do it, then," I said, moaning. "I want it now."  
She trailed her mouth down my body, her hands leading the way. Her fingers caressed my breasts as her tongue flicked over my nipples and then traced a path down over my stomach. Her hand brushed over my hip bone and my body jerked as her touch sent electric tingles racing through me.  
"You like this?" she asked, losing sight of her original destination as she targeted my hip bone, lapping it with her tongue and sucking on my skin. I moaned and writhed, falling further into desire, losing control as sensation and pleasure overpowered me.  
"_Fuck,"_ I said, digging my heels into the mattress and pushing myself towards her.  
"You wanted fucked?" she asked, her voice teasing. Her hands moved to spread my thighs and she raised up to look down at me. "I've looked at mine with a mirror a couple of times, but it's kind of like a body part that's shrouded in mystery since you can't really see it very well. Yours is so pretty. Just looking at it's making me way too excited."  
I watched her face. Even now she had an innocent air about her, an unguarded honesty, an untainted trust. It reached out for something inside of me, opened something up, made me want to pull her into me and protect her.  
She reached out and ran her fingers over the lips of my cunt. "You get a full wax, too," she said. The look on her face was incredible, a mixture of hunger and excitement. It made the muscles inside of me clench with need. "I totally get why Eisuke makes me get them. I can see everything. It looks so soft and delicious."  
I moaned. She was killing me. I knew exactly what she was seeing. There _was_ something special about looking at a woman's body, seeing her most secret place. It was tender and vulnerable - hot, wet and inviting - so very different from looking at a man's hard cock.  
Her thumb stroked up my center and rubbed over my clit as she bent her head and followed it with her tongue. I spread my thighs further, tightening my skin, opening myself up as much as possible for her. This was _Olivia_, touching me, tasting me. This was absolutely forbidden. We were not supposed to be here. I was never supposed to experience this. It was impossible, but it was happening. Even in my dreams, I'd have been going down on her. I'd never have imagined her with her head between my legs.  
Excitement flooded my veins, tinged with the fear of what would happen when what we were doing was discovered. Waves of heat crashed over my body as small fingers spread my folds open and her tongue and lips explored my sensitive flesh.  
"You _do_ taste good," she said, barely parting her lips from my skin, her breath puffing over me, sending shivers up my spine. "I was wondering."  
I moaned and her tongue made its way back to my clit. I was aching, so turned on that I was having trouble stringing my thoughts together. I hoped that would be enough, that my excitement would make up for her lack of experience. If not I was ready to take control, to tell her how to touch me to get me off. I'd done it before with both men and women, it wasn't a big deal.  
But she surprised me, beginning a pattern of swirling her tongue around my clit and then sucking it into her mouth, doing it again and again, gradually increasing the pressure until I was crying out with pleasure, holding my hips inches above the mattress, pressed firmly to her mouth. She reached her hands up and took my nipples between her fingers, twisting and pinching them mercilessly. My chest was heaving and my legs were shaking. My clit was swollen in her mouth as she played with it with her tongue. Just as I was about to come she scrapped it ever so gently with her teeth, making me thrash and scream as I came hard, seeing stars as an orgasm rocked through me and I collapsed back onto the bed.  
"_Fuck,"_ I said breathlessly, reaching up to pull her towards me as she came up over me, holding her and looking in her eyes. She was turned on and glowing with triumph. "I didn't expect that."  
"You didn't think I'd get you off?" she asked with a cute little pout.  
"This was your first time," I reminded her, molding her tits in my hands. "I expected at least a little fumbling."  
"I told you, I've been wanting this for awhile," she explained. "I've been paying extra attention to Eisuke's techniques."  
"_Ugh_. I did not need to know that," I said, closing my eyes and trying to ward off mental imagines.  
Olivia laughed and said, "It's my turn, right? Do you have toys? I really want to use toys. And take a bath together. And a shower. Do you have one of those double ended dildos?"  
"Yeah," I answered, feeling a mix of emotions. It sounded like Olivia and I were going to have a lot of fun, but I had to wonder if Eisuke wasn't going to make me pay for every single thing I did wrong. Just like he'd made me pay for the damages to the hood of his car when Soryu fucked me on it.

_Author's Note: Yep, Olivia really jumped out of the box in this one. I've been trying for weeks to put her back in that box, but she wouldn't shut up. Then when I went to write the smut scene, she took control. Totally unexpected. I had to make so many changes to the rest of this short story because she did this :(. _


	3. Long Suffering

_**Soryu**_

There was a knock at my office door, and when I called, "Come in", Sakiko stepped inside. I smiled spontaneously, feeling the usual warmth spread through me at the sight of her. She was wearing a short dress, but she hadn't bothered to put on tights to protect her legs from the low winter temperatures. It was odd. I'd had to take off pants or peel off thick tights to get to her skin for the past few weeks. I wondered why she'd opted to bare her skin to the cold as she crossed the room and walked around my desk to give me a good morning kiss.  
As I'd expected, she was cold. Her lips were chilly but her tongue was hot as she pushed it into my mouth, tangling with my own tongue. I moaned with satisfaction, letting her know how much I loved the taste and feel of her in my mouth. I stroked my hands over the smooth skin of her thighs, trying to warm them up before I slipped up beneath her dress to cup and massage her ass cheeks, left bare by thong panties.  
My cock twitched in my pants and I slid a hand around to her stomach, skimming a finger under the waistband of her panties to tease her. To my surprise she pulled back, breaking our kiss and standing up straight. I let her go, disappointed to lose the feel of her skin beneath my palms.  
"You're late this morning," I said. She normally arrived at headquarters early each morning to help Inui prepare breakfast. "Did you stay up all night talking to Olivia?"  
I watched as a strange set of emotions played across her face and felt a little flame of dread flare in my stomach. What exactly was going on between Eisuke and Olivia? Were things worse than I'd predicted?  
"I slept with her," Sakiko said, the words escaping her lips with the force of a secret breaking free of its restraints.  
My mind went blank with shock at the unexpected words. "What? How?" I struggled to make sense of what she'd said. Confusion filled my mind, edged with darker emotions that threatened to break through and overwhelm me, betrayal, rage, despair and alarm.  
"She asked for it, it wasn't my idea. I knew it was a bad idea because of Eisuke, but she was really persuasive. She said she'd make sure Eisuke didn't blame me," she said, as if that justified such a terrible decision.  
Words and phrases careened through my mind. Accusations and derogatory terms, but I fought them all back. I couldn't shout about her being easy, a slut, a whore, even though the pain that was threatening to overwhelm me demanded that I lash out. Those words would hurt her, and I'd vowed to protect her. Those words were unfair. I knew exactly who she was when I fell in love with her. I'd agreed when we started our relationship that she'd be free to sleep with others. I'd tried to keep her satisfied so she wouldn't feel the need to look to someone else, but in the end my efforts hadn't paid off.  
"I'm sorry," she said, breaking the silence that had filled the room while I struggled with myself. "I decided the other day that I was ready to start fucking other people, but I was going to talk to you about it first. This thing with Olivia just sort of came out of nowhere. I didn't want to tell her no."  
"You're '_ready'_ to start fucking other people," I echoed, fighting to wrap my mind around her words. "Things have been going so well for us…"  
"_I know,"_ she said, reaching out to take my hand between hers. I let it lay there limp, unresponsive. I wasn't ready to meet her halfway. "All of those things you did to try to overwrite my memories of other men, they had a different effect on me. They made me get in touch with how much I love you. They helped me to not be so afraid of my love and your love and our relationship."  
She squeezed my hand with her cold fingers. Tears were sparkling in the corners of her eyes. "I don't want to hurt you," she said. "You said that you accepted me for who I am. You said that we could have an open relationship."  
She was turning the gun around and pointing it at me. She hadn't cheated, she'd been holding a free pass. I was the one behaving badly, failing to live up to the promises that I'd made, failing to give her what she needed.  
I took a deep breath and struggled for control. I moved my fingers, they felt frozen inside of her hands. I turned my palm and wrapped her hand in mine, pulling it towards me and resting my forehead against her precious skin.  
"This is never going to be easy for me," I began, the words hurting my throat. "I love you. You're mine and I don't want anyone else touching you, but I know that you need more than just me. I want to support you and understand you. Before now it had just been theory. I need a little time to learn to put it into practice."  
"It isn't like you're not enough," she said. There were tears in her voice. She was upset because she was hurting me.  
It was the backwards edge of a knife, too weak and at the wrong time. She should care about my feelings and refrain from doing the things that would hurt me. Her love for me should stop her from cheating on me, but that wasn't how she worked. Her love was a selfish love, taking everything that I had to give and returning her love in fits and starts, always on her terms. I knew that. I lived and breathed it every single day.  
I knew that she was troubled. I knew she struggled with the inner demons of her past. I knew that I shouldn't be surprised by anything that she did. Those demons could rear their heads and take her over at any time. I'd been playing a game, fooling myself into believing that I could smother her with love and drown those demons out. That was impossible. They were as much a part of her as her heartbeat. I would never be able to defeat them.  
"_You are enough,"_ she continued. "You are amazing and wonderful. You are perfect. I never thought anyone could love me, and you love me with every breath in your body. _I know that._ And you satisfy me sexually in ways that I never even imagined possible, but-" There was always a but with her. "-this isn't about sex and it isn't about love. It just balances something out inside of me. Being in love and being in a relationship scares the shit out of me. That's getting so much better, but it will probably never go away entirely. Fucking other people will help me to love you and stay with you without that fear. It will let me breathe. If I don't have it, my love for you will eventually suffocate."  
I slid my hand up her arm and over to her body, pulling her into an embrace. She came eagerly, sitting on my lap and wrapping her arms around me, laying her head on my shoulder. She was my greatest source of pain and my only true comfort. I had to do my best to understand her and accept whatever she did. I couldn't live without her.  
"I know," I said, hugging her tightly to me. "I'll do better." I closed my eyes against the pain, forcing it back. "We'll have to figure something out. I don't want to be left in the dark, but knowing what you're doing is hard for me to deal with. We'll have to find something that works."  
"Okay," she said. "I don't want to hide anything from you, but I don't want to throw things up in your face, either."  
I stroked her hair quietly for awhile and eventually let out a sigh. "We're going to have to deal with Eisuke."  
"I know," she said. "Will you tell him? If I go anywhere near him, he'll see it on me. There's no telling what he'll do if I'm standing right in front of him when he finds out."  
"Yeah, I'll tell him," I replied. What else could I do? She was right and it was my job to protect her.  
"What do you want?" she asked, sitting up and putting her hands on my shoulders, looking me in the eye.  
I sat my hands on her waist and answered with brutal honesty. "I want to fuck you hard enough to erase the memory of Olivia from your body. I want to throw you to the floor and tell you to get away from me. I want to bury myself in you and forget all of my pain."  
"You don't want to do all three?" Her eyes were glowing with sex and mischief, her mouth was a tempting pout. "I was sure you'd want to punish me for being such a bad girl."  
The rage that usually slept inside of me rolled over, setting off alarms. It wanted to surface and make her pay. "We'd better hold off on that," I said, frowning at her dress. It _was_ short, but it was like a long sweater, long sleeved and high necked. It was blocking me from getting to her tits. I wanted to touch them. I needed to distract myself and her from the idea of punishment. "Right now I'd lose all self control."  
"I like it when you let go on me," she said, her voice full of sex and temptation. "I want you to hurt me."  
"Is this going to become some sort of sick habit?" I asked, trying to deflect her and myself. "You go fuck other people and then come home for your punishment?"  
She shifted on my lap, straddling my legs, putting her knees on the chair on either side of me and then raising up to pull off the frustrating dress. She tossed the ball of fabric to the side and sat back down on me, the perfect coquette, breasts framed by a white lacy bra, a little red ribbon on the matching panties.  
"Is there a problem with that? It sounds like wicked fun to me." She slid her fingertips over the curve of skin above her bra and then dipped down to unfasten the clasp that held the pretty fabric together. She pulled the cups open, revealing her tits to me, firm and soft, pink nipples already hard and begging to be touched and tasted.  
"Soryu, please," she begged, licking her lips. Her words washed over me at the same time my eyes fell on a small kiss mark that Olivia must have left on her hip bone. She'd found one of Sakiko's sensitive spots. Sakiko's plea brought out my need to spoil her, to give her whatever she asked for. The mark on her skin made my rage boil over. My hands itched to touch her. My hands ached to hurt her.  
I stood up abruptly, dumping her out of my lap with no warning. She tumbled to the floor with a little cry and looked up at me, the shock and hint of pain in her eyes was quickly replaced with excitement. I kicked my foot back, sending the chair skidding away on its wheels, and dropped down over her. My hands went to her, frenzied and disordered. I yanked a bra strap down one of her arms and then moved to rip off her panties, baring her to my eyes and hands. She was mine and she'd been defiled. She'd misbehaved. I needed to claim and punish her.  
"Roll over and present your ass to me," I growled, a phrase from the bdsm course I'd taken coming unbidden to my tongue. I watched as she flipped over quickly and stuck her ass in her air. She was trembling with excitement or fear. Probably both. I knew her well enough to know that she was in ecstasy, waiting for my hand to fall.  
She had a safeword, but she wouldn't use it. She was determined to give me whatever I wanted. She'd let me go too far and hurt her too much in the past. Her misplaced obstinance and my exploding rage were a dangerous combination. I knew it, but I was beyond stopping. Her ass was poised in the air, twitching in anticipation. There was no going back.  
I brought my hand down on her ass. In brutality. In hate. She'd betrayed me, like all women. Even though she'd pledged herself to me and told me she loved me countless times. Still, the weakness in her and her innate selfishness meant she could not be trusted. She could only be punished because she would never be tamed.  
The blood was rushing in my ears, drowning out her cries, but I could hear them well enough to recognize the mixture of pain and passion that always touched on something deep within me. My half-hard cock was suddenly fully erect and pounding. My desire to fuck her fueled my hand as it assaulted her ass.  
I spanked her mercilessly. Watching as her asscheeks pinkened and then turned red. Watching as sweat rose up and slicked her skin. Watching as her body shook and jolted while I rained my anger down on her. I spanked her until the desire to fuck her, to invade her body, to rend it and sear my claim deep inside of her, overpowered my need to hurt her.  
I abandoned her ass and began unfastening my belt and pants. She was crying, sobbing, shaking so hard that it almost looked like spasms, but her ass was still in the air begging for more. I pulled out my cock and prepared to enter her, feeling the slick, wetness of her lips around my tip before I plunged roughly into her, grabbing her hips and yanking her back, thrusting deep until I was fully embedded in her, pressed hard against her womb.  
I paused and let the feel of it wash over me. Her hot slick walls grasping and spasming around my length, her womb caressing my tip. She was screaming, the sound bouncing off my office walls. Her body was jerking, she was probably trying to fuck herself on my dick, but I held her hips firmly and wouldn't let her move. Her round ass was pressed against my stomach, the red skin glowing like a beacon. I wanted to lick it, to taste the pain that I had given her on her skin.  
The thought got me moving, pulling my cock out of her as she clenched around it and then thrusting back in, hard, with no consideration for what she was feeling or if she would or would not orgasm. She'd have to find her own way to release with whatever I decided to give her. I fucked her fast and hard, pounding relentlessly, driving myself into her, listening to her cries and trying to force more out of her. I grabbed her arms and pulled them towards me, grasping her wrists and holding them tightly in my hands, holding her so that her chest was suspended above the ground, so that my hands were the only thing supporting her.  
I watched the lines of her back, her dark hair in its usual ponytail swishing with each deep plunge of my cock. I couldn't see her eyes, but tears were trailing down her cheeks, I made note of them as they broke free of her skin and hit the floor. Her voice called out her pain, moans, cries and screams tumbling from her lips, exposing her pleasure.  
I dropped one of her wrists and then the other, letting her return to holding herself up as I bent over her back. She was shaking, unsteady, jerking forward and threatening to collapse every time I slammed into her. I had one hand on the floor to support myself and raised the other to cross over her chest, holding her to me, making sure she didn't fall.  
My feelings were a twisted knot, a writhing ball of snakes, ever changing. I hated her. I wanted to hurt her. I loved her. I wanted to protect her. She was the perfect foil for my own ruined psyche. She would take everything that I had to give her and beg for more, be it a slap or a caress. I dropped my mouth down next to her ear and whispered, "You're mine. All of you. No matter who touches you, you will always fucking belong to me."  
She'd orgasmed a few times while I was fucking her, but my words caused her to come hard. Her pussy clenched hard on my cock and her body spasmed under me as high pitched screams broke from her mouth. I plunged into her again and again, her walls grasping at me as the hot tension of sexual pleasure filled me and built to its explosive release. I came in her, deep, filling her with me, staining her insides, marking her as mine.  
The triumph of possession over, I pulled out of her and pushed her away from me. She fell in a heap on the floor, curling up on herself, breathing raggedly and shaking. The rage was still running hot in my blood. I looked down at her dispassionately, disconnected from my usual feelings of love.  
"Get out of here," I said, cold and callous. "I have work to do."  
I kicked her panties out of the way and pulled my chair back over to my desk, sitting down and focusing immediately on the spreadsheet on my screen. It took her a few minutes to get up. She stood with a soft moan and wobbled, unstable on her feet. I reached out a hand to grasp her upper arm, barely glancing at her as I steadied her. She took a few moments to find her balance. Her arm, thin and soft under my fingers, reminded me of how fragile she was. Small and delicate, despite her overblown personality and inner strength.  
Guilt tried to rush in, but there was enough anger in me to act as a dam, to deflect it away. She'd asked for this. Wanted it. Pushed me. Begged for it. I'd be my usual calm and loving self another time. This time I'd given her the anger and the violence that she claimed to crave. She would not blame me and I would not condemn myself.  
She'd donned her clothes and was heading towards the door. I stopped her with a question. "What is it that Eisuke and Olivia are fighting about?" The information would help me deal with Eisuke and to predict what would happen between the two of them. I hadn't gone so far as to start making plans for relocating Olivia if she didn't return to him, but I would need to get to work on it soon.  
She turned to look at me. Her cheeks were still flushed and her hair was in complete disarray. She looked beautiful. "I don't know. She still won't tell me. She said he accused her of something that she didn't do. That's all I know."  
"That's it?" I asked. I'd assumed that she'd discovered one of Eisuke's secrets.  
"Yeah. Whatever it is, it's making her question her future with him." I nodded thoughtfully and she hesitated for a moment before saying nervously, "Where do you want me tonight? At your apartment or at mine?"  
"I always want you with me." My answer was automatic.  
"Thanks," she said. "For everything." Before disappearing out the door.

"Hey," Eisuke said, looking over his laptop as I crossed the living room on the second floor of the penthouse.  
"We need to talk," I said, taking a seat on one of the couches. I wasn't going to stand in front of his desk like a wayward child.  
He took a seat in a chair across from me and raised his eyebrows. "What's going on?"  
There was the situation with Shin Aida, the corporation, his underground organization and his runaway girlfriend. The potential number of things that could be wrong was limitless. Whatever he was quietly conjecturing, there was no way he would be prepared for the bomb that I was about to drop.  
"Sakiko and Olivia fucked," I said bluntly. There was no reason to sugar coat things with Eisuke.  
"What the fuck are you talking about?" he spat back. "If that's true I'm going to destroy your little slut."  
"Apparently it was Olivia's idea and she talked Sakiko into it. She assured Sakiko that you wouldn't seek revenge," I explained, keeping a bored tone in my voice. If I didn't get too excited, it would help him to stay calm.  
"What is she thinking? What does she think she's doing? Has she gone completely insane?" he ranted.  
I leaned forward. "Listen, Eisuke, I don't know what the two of you are fighting about, but you obviously need to do something to get Olivia under control."  
"Olivia?" he asked. "What about Sakiko? Olivia's obviously in a crisis state and Sakiko's taking advantage of her. You need to control that bitch."  
"Yeah, I don't think that's the case," I replied with a frown. "And Sakiko and I have an open relationship. I don't try to control her."  
He silently digested what I'd said. No one knew Eisuke as well as I did. He looked calm but inside he wanted to break everything he could get his hands on. Rage and tension were radiating off of him.  
"An open relationship?" His voice was filled with disgust. "Allowing yourself to be made a cuckold is not an open relationship. This is just another example of the 'long suffering Soryu'. You're addicted to emotional torment."  
"What in the hell are you talking about?" I snapped. I knew he was attacking me in order to give himself time to process what Olivia had done. "I'm not long suffering."  
He levelled a stare at me as he said, "You have your difficult childhood, your mommy issues, your voluntary celibacy after _one_ relationship went sour and your refusal to accept your love for me. Now you've finally got a girlfriend. After rejecting scores of perfectly suitable women, you've chosen one so fucked up that you are guaranteed to never be truly happy. You're in a fucking open relationship? Congratulations. You're addicted to pain."  
"We've all got our issues," I said with a shrug. Internally, I couldn't stop replaying his words. I'd never looked at my life the way he was describing it. Could he be right? It was something to be pocketed and contemplated later. "I want to know what's going on with Olivia. Do I need to start making long term arrangements?"  
"Huh. You want to send her away so you can keep Sakiko's fingers out of her pussy," he said, tightening the screws.  
I let the room fill with silence before I replied. "I can't believe you're talking about Olivia that way."  
"She betrayed me," he said. His tone was bored but I could see the anger that boiled just below the surface in the way he overly controlled his movements - flicking his fingertips through his hair and then resting his arm along the back of the couch. He was working hard to appear at ease. "One fight and she runs off and jumps into bed with someone else. It makes a mockery of all the pretty words she's said about love and trust."  
"She's struggling to cope with your relationship," I said. It was time to stop pushing him. If things went too far, he'd refuse to take her back and we'd all be living a nightmare until he let go of his pride and got her back. "You're difficult to be with."  
"Tell that to all the women who begged me to keep them. Olivia's overly emotional. She's not easy to deal with herself. I could pick any one of thousands of women who would stay quietly by my side and I ended up with a minx who can't settle down," he argued.  
"Those women just want your money and your name. Olivia wants you. Is she really the one at fault here?" I asked, trying to figure out what was really going on.  
"We both made mistakes. It was a misunderstanding, or so she claims. Sakiko hasn't told you everything?" he asked, watching me a little too closely.  
"No. Olivia won't tell her what the two of you fought about," I said. "I find that strange. Women usually tell each other everything."  
"We've all got our secrets," he said vaguely. "Women especially. They shouldn't be trusted. Things will work out faster if you keep yours closer to home."  
I shook my head in frustration. "We're going in circles. Just tell me what you want so I can try to make it happen. Do you want her back?"  
"Ever the efficient personal assistant. Cleaning up all my messes," he mocked. "Of course I want her back."  
"You're not trying to work things out on your own," I pointed out.  
"I don't trust myself," he said, emotion finally coloring his voice. "I won't be able to control myself. Especially now that she and Sakiko are playing scissor sisters. I'll only make things worse."  
"I'll talk to her," I said, feeling a pang of empathy now that he was relaxing his guard. "I can't make any promises, but I'll do a better job than Sakiko. She seems to be sabotaging your reconciliation. Probably in more ways than one."

"I thought it was you," Olivia said when she opened the door to Sakiko's apartment.  
"You were expecting me?" I asked as I stepped inside and began removing me coat and shoes.  
"Yeah," she said, looking uncomfortable. "Are you here to yell at me for what I did to Sakiko or to try to talk to me for Eisuke."  
"Both," I said. I couldn't help but smile. She looked very guilty.  
"You shouldn't be too mad at me." She went on the offensive to try to protect herself. "Sakiko told me that you guys have an open relationship."  
"That is true," I admitted, lowering myself into a chair while she took a seat on the couch. "But I never would have expected someone so close to me to lay hands on her."  
She looked pained. "Yeah, I don't know if I can say I'm sorry for what I did, but I'm sorry that I hurt you. You're one of the few people that I can really trust."  
"Just don't do it again," I said. I was trying to hold her at a distance mentally. I didn't want to understand her feelings or think about her point of view. The anger that I usually kept buried was still seeping, dark tendrils of violence interlaced with my usual thoughts. If she touched on one of them, I'd end up lashing out. I didn't want that to happen.  
"Are you sure?" she asked, not meeting my eyes. She knew that she was asking too much. "I don't think it would hurt if we just fooled around while I'm staying here."  
She didn't realize the danger that she was in. Not that I'd lay a hand on her, but I was ready to verbally destroy her. I had to keep her away from my triggers. I had to remind myself that I'd been protecting her from the beginning. She was special to me. I counted her as a friend.  
"Eisuke's already pissed because you did this. Leave it be. If you keep fooling around with Sakiko, he's going to feel like he has to make her pay," I said. I didn't talk about my feelings or what I wanted. "You had your fun, but if you push things further you're going to create a mess."  
She nodded, her eyes looking at something in the distance. She was coming to realize that she'd taken things too far. This wasn't a game or a joke. "You're right," she said, her voice full of sadness.  
"Talk to me about Eisuke," I said. It was time to get off the subject of Sakiko. I didn't want to hear Olivia speak of her again. "I don't know what you two are fighting about."  
"We're not really fighting," she said, shaking her head with a sigh. She began talking about her future children being locked up and in danger.  
I let her speak her mind and then said, "Children grow up like that all the time. I did."  
"Yeah, and Sakiko told me your brothers and sisters were kidnapped and killed," she snapped. She wasn't happy that I'd minimized her concerns.  
"That's true, but my uncle had stopped protecting them after my father died. He didn't try to negotiate for their safe return," I explained. "You know yourself that Eisuke will never let anything happen to you or your children."  
A strange look passed through her eyes. I pressed forward. "What is this really about?"  
She looked at me in surprise, opening her mouth to deny that there was any issue besides those involving her imaginary children, but she closed her mouth as realization dawned on her face. "You're right. There's more…"  
She became lost in thought and I gave her time to think. The quiet was dangerous. I fought off images of her hands and mouth on Sakiko. I was going to have to get true control of myself. There was no telling how often Sakiko would end up sleeping with other people. I couldn't react like this every time. I had to be calm and collected. I had to be the understanding and supportive man that she needed me to be.  
I turned my thoughts to her. She was what was important, not Olivia. She'd be waiting for me back at my apartment. I was going to spend the entire night making love to her. I had to make up for the inappropriate way that I'd reacted that morning when she'd confessed her sins. I had to try to make up for the violent way that I'd treated her. I'd do everything that I could to remind her of how much I love her. I had to show her how much I treasured her.  
"It's because I feel helpless," Olivia said, pulling my attention back to reality. "I'm trapped in the hotel. I didn't even earn my job. I'm given everything that I want but I have no power. I'm like a pet in a cage."  
"What?" I asked, completely surprised by her words.  
"Even with Eisuke, I'm just beating my head against the wall all the time, trying to be an equal in our relationship. He's so strong and I'm so pathetic. He'd be happy if I gave up and was completely submissive," she said. Her eyes were still distant. She was still processing her thoughts and feelings. "I don't want to live my whole life feeling so powerless."  
"You've got this all wrong, Olivia," I said, shaking my head. "You're the boss's wife. The ane-san. The only person more powerful than you is Eisuke."  
"I'm not the _wife_," she argued. "I'm the _girlfriend."_  
I held her eyes as I said, "Do you really think he's not going to marry you? You're not the girlfriend. You're not the mistress. Even if you don't have a ring on your finger, you're the wife. You have all the power that you choose to take."  
"It doesn't really seem like it…" she said thoughtfully, her voice sad.  
"That's because you've been looking at this whole thing from the wrong perspective," I explained. "You don't ask for permission, you _give orders._ Stop thinking of yourself as a helpless victim and take control. You're the second in command."  
"_You're the second in command,"_ she said. "You're crazy if you think I outrank you."  
"You've got Eisuke by the heart and the balls," I said, feeling a fleeting twinge of pain. That spot had always been open for me, but I'd turned my back on it. "He'll choose you over everyone else, _every single time._ Make no mistake. You can relax. You're chasing the tail when you already have the tiger."  
She was shaking her head in wonder, trying to accept what I was saying. "Are you sure?"  
"Of course I'm sure. I wish my grandmother was still alive. She'd give you ane-san lessons. The Ice Dragons were ten times more afraid of her than they were of my grandfather. They called her the Poison Lily. One wrong look from her and someone would slit your throat in an alley," I said fondly. Olivia was looking at me with a mixture of surprise and fear.  
"_Is_ there someone to give me lessons?" she asked.  
I laughed. "The first person that comes to mind is Mei, but Eisuke definitely won't want you spending a lot of time with her now. I'll look into it and find someone. Sakiko might as well take some lessons, too. It won't be long before I'm ready to make my move and take over the Ice Dragons entirely. She'll be the ane-san of the whole organization."  
"Yeah," Olivia mused. "I hope we don't have to actually have anyone killed. I don't think I could do that."  
"You might if it was someone who was threatening your child," I suggested, watching her eyebrows shoot up. "Does this mean you're ready to go back to Eisuke."  
I watched her eyes turn dark. "No. No, I still need time to think. It feels like I'll need a lot of time. Maybe I could start my ane-san lessons before I go back? Do you think Sakiko will mind if I stay longer? Should I find somewhere else to stay?"  
"I'm sure Sakiko won't mind if you stay here," I said, vowing that she'd be staying as many nights in my apartment as possible. "It'll be more convenient because of the extra guards. It's easier to secure one place than two. I'll find someone to give you lessons right away. I already have a few possibilities in mind."  
She thanked me, but my thoughts had already turned towards Sakiko and home. It had been a long day. I wanted to get back to her, to be near her and hold her. I wanted to forget about Eisuke and Olivia and all of our other problems for awhile. I wanted to spend some time focusing on making the two of us happy.


	4. Gone

_**Eisuke**_

Anger is filling me. More with each minute that passes. It tightens my muscles, turning them to steel. I am wrought with tension. A coiled spring. A piano wire waiting to snap. The fury is building up in layers. All of it accumulating in an attempt to smother the Pain of Olivia's absence. The Anger is ice cold and the Pain is a ball of lead that grows heavier with every breath. _She is not here._ The words repeat with every beat of my heart.  
I must turn a deaf ear to it. I cannot afford to hear it. I must be blind to the fact that Her seat is empty. She is not there to greet me when I return home. She is not lying next to me in our bed. I must ignore it all. And so the Anger builds, rising ever higher. Until I want to kill someone. If only I could get my hands on Shin Aida. He has threatened Chisato. He has challenged my honor and my power. He deserves to die. I want to feel his neck being crushed beneath my hands.  
This is wrong. This Pain. This Anger. This Passion. These feelings that encroach upon me though I've spent my life crushing them down, obliterating them. I have cultivated Emptiness. I have transmuted myself into a machine. I only permit myself to feel satisfaction, cold anger, and the burning desire to attain my goals. These feelings - Love. Loss. Joy. Yearning. - they are not allowed. They do not have an acceptable role in my life. I left them behind long ago when I lost my family. But She brought them back.  
They are a punch in the gut. They leave me stunned. I can turn a corner and see Her, or any one of a thousand things that remind me of Her, and be struck by a myriad of forbidden emotions. Now I see the empty space where She should be and there is only Pain and Anger. And the echo of tears shed long ago.  
She does not belong here. Love does not belong here. I should have cast Her out of my life long ago. I should have seen the danger in Her sparkling eyes and Her trembling lips. In the way the curve of Her waist meets Her hip. But it is impossible to turn Her Away. She will not leave. I cannot let Her go.  
But She is gone now and everything is upside down. Everything is Wrong. I cannot take a step without it feeling out of place. I cannot take a breath without feeling the Pain of Her loss. She is not here and that is the beginning and the end of everything. My every moment is colored with Her absence.  
Life goes on. A lesson learned when Mother Died and Father Left and Yukari was Taken Away. There is nothing that stops just because you've Lost Something. Even your heart will go on beating though the Pain feels as if it will kill you. I get up like normal and go about my day. I take care of business like always. I go to meetings and make crucial decisions. No one knows that a knife is stabbing into me. No one can guess that I want to tear apart everything that I see.

Soryu comes at the wrong time. I'm supposed to be working but instead I'm sitting at my desk staring past my laptop at the couch. A memory of Olivia is playing, tearing at my soul. She's sitting on the couch, chattering about her day with a big smile on her face. She is Happy Sounds. Sweet Smells. Soft Curves. She climbs onto my lap and puts her arms around my neck, tells me to touch her. It keeps playing, over and over again. I'm clenching my fists, holding myself in check. I want to destroy the room, one object at a time.  
Soryu's eyes reveal that he can see how angry I am. He averts his gaze and takes a seat in a chair. I get up and sit in the chair nearest him. I avoid the couch. The ghost of Olivia is there. I don't want to disturb Her, and if I get too close, She might break me.  
"You've been to see Olivia." I'm watching him closely. He's reluctant to meet my eyes. He's hiding something.  
"I talked to her," He's dragging his feet. He doesn't want to give me bad news. Emotions turn in my chest. Anger. Worry. Fear.  
"It didn't go well. She's not with you. What's going on?" I spit the words out. I'd trusted him to fix this for me. If Soryu couldn't solve whatever problem was troubling Her, things were looking grim.I fought to hold myself in check.  
"It's not that bad." His tone is reassuring. He's trying to calm me down, but he's not lying. "She's upset about a couple of things. She feels powerless locked in the hotel and beholden to you for everything. She's also worried about having kids. She doesn't want them to grow up locked in the penthouse with their lives in danger."  
His words cut through my mind with a serrated blade. I give Her everything She wants, but it doesn't make Her happy. I share my home with Her and She feels it's a prison. She's worried about future children. She said I'd be a terrible father. It takes me awhile to respond to Soryu. My Anger is expanding, threatening to break free. "This sounds bad."  
"It's not, really." As usual he remains calm. "She's just got the wrong perspective. She needs to stop acting like a mistress kept around for sex and start acting like the ane-san."  
"The ane-san. If that's the solution why isn't She here?" I'm approaching my limits. Threads are unraveling. I need to stay in control. I have to hear what he has to say. I need to understand what She's thinking. I need to know what's happening.  
"She still wants a break. She wants to take lessons on how to be an ane-san and she wants to have a few of them before she comes back." He's talking like this all makes sense. Ane-san lessons and taking a break. A break from _me_ as if I am harmful to her.  
"How long?" At this point it is the only important question.  
"I don't know. Let's give her time and space and whatever else she needs. She's hurting and trying to work things out for herself. I don't think it will take too long." He's calm and level-headed. It's not his slut hiding herself away from him. To him this is just another problem to be solved.  
I can't speak. I want to say, '_How long is too long?" _It's already been too long, but She needs more. I always want to give Her everything, but this is asking too much. This is fraying my soul.  
Soryu moves on, starts talking about our efforts to get gambling legalized in South Korea so that we can build a Tres Spades in Seoul. His voice drones on. My ears are buzzing. I'm suffocating. I stand up, grab a vase off the table next to me and hurl it into a large mirror hanging on the wall across the room. I walk out. Away from Soryu and the apartment that is riddled with reminders of Her. Away from the hotel and into the city. It does no good. It doesn't matter where I am, She isn't there.

_I need Her. _

_I need Her. _

_I need Her. _

"Good morning, Eisuke."  
I look up to see Sakiko crossing the room towards me. She's talked herself up a false sense of bravado and is approaching me as if she has no reason to fear me. Her head is back and her eyes are blazing. I reject all images of her touching Olivia and focus on the present.  
She reaches my desk and I stare at her silently for a while, just waiting for her to squirm. She's a rebellious little thing though. She stares back and refuses to give in. It makes me want to laugh. I have to admire her strength, even though I'd like to slap the little smile off her face. But she's Olivia's friend, so I can't hurt her. And she belongs to Soryu. If anyone is going to punish her, it'll have to be him. It remains to be seen just how much of her shit he'll be willing to put up with before he snaps.  
"What do you have to report?" I watch her carefully. She's wily, full of tricks and practiced at lying.  
"Not much. She went to visit someone. She said it was a friend from school. And I guess she went out to do some shopping. I wasn't there, so I don't know exactly what she did. I can only go by what she told me." There's a little fear in her eyes. She's worried that she isn't bringing me enough information. That I'll want more and she won't have it.  
"I know all this. The guards report immediately after every event." I make sure my voice sounds bored and irritated. She'd refused to squirm when I stared at her, but this was something different.  
"Yeah, well. I should report anyway. She was a little funny after she came back from visiting her friend. Like on edge or something. She couldn't sit still. She was fidgety."  
"Fidgety? No idea why?" I've already had her friend investigated. A young woman that Olivia knew during university. An accountant with a cat. Single. She broke up with her boyfriend four months ago.  
Sakiko looks away. She's nervous now. "She isn't flirting with me anymore. Not since she went to see her friend. And she's been, like, happier. I don't know what that means…"  
"You think She's fucking Her friend?" I keep my voice calm but Anger is tightening within me. Sakiko might be right. Olivia could have practiced eating cunt on Soryu's little slut and then connected with some bitch that She'd been infatuated with in university. She's mine. It can't be possible that She would choose some pallid number cruncher's pussy over me. I make a mental note to have a company that I own in Nagasaki offer Olivia's friend a position and salary that she won't be able to refuse. I must clear the way of all obstacles.  
"I don't know about that. It doesn't really seem like something Olivia would do, but _something's_ different." She's backtracking. She has no idea what she's talking about. She's making guesses and bringing them to me. I'll get rid of the accountant just to play things conservatively.  
"Anything else?"  
"She accepted the invitation to Mei's engagement party." She saves the most important news for last.  
Olivia will be at the party. She'll be near me. I'll be able to see Her. We'll talk. I'll convince Her to return to me. I won't allow Her to leave. I'll bring Her back to the penthouse no matter what. "This is good news."  
She shrugs, playing indifferent. She sees an opportunity to take a shot at me and uses it. "We'll have to watch her around Mei. She was talking about fucking Mei."  
Her face is twisted, revealing that she is just as disgusted by that thought as I am. She despises Mie, though Mei is the closest thing you'll find to Sakiko's own behavior. It's typical for people to hate their own traits when they see them in others because deep down they hate themselves. "Is She really that hungry for pussy? She's fucked you, she's fucking an old friend and you think She can't be trusted near Mei?"  
I'm skeptical. Olivia is sweetly passionate in bed. She wants all that I'll give her, but She's never come off as desperate or sluttish.  
"She's making use of her freedom." Her voice is too casual and careless. "She figures she won't be able to enjoy women once she's gone back to you. I only spent one night with her. I think she's looking for other opportunities."  
I don't like the picture she's painting. It doesn't sit well with me. It doesn't seem like the Olivia I know. "Fuck her then. I don't want her fooling around with random women. I don't want her touching Mei. You take care of her."  
"I told you she's not flirting with me anymore." She's angry at the thought that Olivia's moved on and doesn't want her.  
"Turn her attention back to you." I'm commanding her to fuck Olivia. Sometimes it's necessary to turn on a dime.  
"But I told Soryu that I wasn't going to do that anymore." She shares her promise as if it means something to me.  
""You didn't care about Soryu when you put your face between Olivia's legs. Don't pretend like you care about him now." I'm watching her like a hawk. Testing her reactions. Plumbing the depths of her feelings for my friend.  
"Don't you fucking say that." She's angry now. Too angry to mind her mouth. "You don't know anything about how I feel. You don't know about our relationship." Her eyes narrow. She gets ready to sting. "And I didn't go down on Olivia. She went down on me first."  
For some reason she thinks this will make me unhappy, but I'm pleased. Olivia didn't lie back and let Herself be used by this little bitch. She was the aggressor. She took control and got what She wanted. I'm proud of Her. "Just do as you're told."  
"_You fucking bastard. There's a limit to what you can do. You can't make me cheat on Soryu. I won't do it."_ She's puffed up, cheeks red, standing her ground.  
"You talk to Soryu and he'll let you do as you like. If Olivia wants you, you let Her have you." My tone is bored but firm. I make her little burst of fury look like a tantrum. "Olivia gets what She wants."  
"This is fucking insane." She's sputtering, caught up in her emotions.  
"That's enough. Tell Olivia I look forward to seeing Her at the party." I wave her away and focus back on my work.  
Sakiko's report has changed things. I now know when I'll see Olivia, but there's still nearly two weeks until the engagement party. Does this mean she doesn't intend to return to me during that time? The days stretch before me, an ocean between us. But I have a target, a goal. I know when I will stand next to Her. When I will see Her face and hear Her voice. Time slides forward, everything focused on the night of the party.

"Fuck this. It's gone on too long. I can't have Her playing me. She needs to just stay gone." Soryu and I are drinking. I'm not drunk, but the alcohol has made me weak. I speak like a child throwing a tantrum, it relieves some of the tension inside of me to toss out some of my thoughts.  
"You'll be okay if she doesn't come back? I can start making a plan for where to put her. She didn't seem too keen on Canada. Maybe London or Monte Carlo." Soryu tries to defuse me by calling my bluff.  
"I never wanted to fall in love in the first place. It's a fucking inconvenience to have her in my life. It makes me weak." He takes a drink from his glass. I wait for him to put it down and meet my eyes. "It was supposed to be you. It would have been different if it was you."  
He frowns at me. "This is where we are. There's no going back."  
"And you're happy? All these years you avoided relationships because people can't be trusted. Now you've barely got that little slut tied down. She's already fucked my woman." His mouth twists. I've scored a point. He doesn't like being reminded that his precious Sakiko is promiscuous.  
"We're talking about Olivia. What are you going to do? Keep waiting for her? Go and get her? Hide her in a foreign country?" He throws the ball back at me, trying to make me uncomfortable.  
"I didn't want her in the first place." The words keep coming out of my mouth, but they're empty. I could argue for days that I've avoided love since I was a child. It doesn't change the fact that She's mine. "But there's no way I can send Her away. She'd fight like a banshee."  
"She's making a mess of you. Maybe no one else can see it, but I can." He wavers between striking at me and comforting me.  
"You never would have made me feel this way," I toss the words at him. They are petty. They show my weakness, but this has been going on for too long and I am beginning to crumble.  
"I think that's the point," he says. "She's the only one that can do this to you."  
"And your little slut, she does it for you?" He's used to this. My need to jab at people and deal low blows. They bounce off of him as if they have no weight.  
"Of course." He shrugs. He spent years deflecting women and love but now that he's found it he lets it in with ridiculous ease.  
I want to hurt him for real but I don't have the strength. "Everything would have been easier if it were just the two of us." I spew weakness like a thirteen-year-old girl.  
"But you let in Baba and Ota and Mamoru. You kept Olivia far closer than was necessary. You aren't as impenetrable as you like to think."  
"That implies that anyone could have done the same if given the chance. That isn't true." I allow myself to be led off topic. To debate nonsense, to take my mind off the Pain and the Loss and the Anger.  
"I agree. She was the right person in the right place at the right time." He stares at me assessingly.  
"You were the right person for all those years and you would never give in." Back to the Pain. I'm chasing it. I won't allow it to escape. He's frowning. I can see on his face that he doesn't want me bringing this up again. It's been years since we talked about it, but Olivia's absence has unlocked a box of snakes. I don't have the energy to fight them.  
"That's debatable. If I were the right person, I would have given in. Since I didn't give in, I'm not the right person." He says it as if it's a simple truth, not a fucked up excuse.  
"You're a coward. You were afraid of letting me in." He always has been. Even before some bitch lied to him about being pregnant and he stopped dating or having sex. Even before that he wouldn't accept me.  
"You would never have let _me_ in. Everything would have stayed the same, we'd have just added fucking to the routine. You would have gotten tired of me in a couple of weeks and it would have been over. We've built a lot together. We'd have lost it all for a few fucks."  
He'd been my best friend since we were twelve years old. He'd always been by my side. He knew me better than anyone but he would never give himself to me. "You insult me. I wouldn't have treated you that way."  
"I'm not convinced. You were going to send Olivia to Canada, remember? You only kept her because she refused to leave you. I would never have clung to you like that. She's the one. Not me."  
"She left this time." Back to the Pain. I have to stab myself with that knife over and over again. To punish myself for breaking the rules and letting Love in.  
"You make it too hard for her to stay. You're nothing but difficult. Why don't you ease up on her a little? She's desperate to stay and it's obvious that you need her. Make it a little easier for her to be around you."  
"Easier said than done," I say with a laugh. She was desperate to stay. I knew that. And She must be desperate to get back to me. She may have things to work through, but She belongs to me. She belongs with me. She knows that very well. "If someone had told us a year ago that we would be ensnared by female employees and they'd be fucking each other behind our backs, we would've thought they were crazy."  
"This _is_ crazy," he says. For the first time I can hear bitterness in his voice. He isn't happy that his little slut put her head between Olivia's thighs. "But don't pretend like she doesn't make you happy. I know she makes you happy. That's what's important. That and she'll be coming back to you soon. I'm sure of it."  
"Soon. What does that mean? An hour from now isn't soon enough. I want Her back now."

I stand in the ballroom on the second floor. The room is filling with guests, most of them from Japan and Hong Kong. Sanjou and Mei are walking around the room greeting everyone. I am standing, staring at the double doors. Waiting for Olivia.  
She steps in. My heart begins to beat. The lights are shining for her. She is dazzling. Her dark hair is swept up, exposing the curve of her neck. Her dress is white with long flowing sleeves, sparkling sequins covering the skirt. Short the way I require it to be. Showing off her beautiful legs. She smiles and begins greeting the people around her. My heart continues to beat.  
I want to hold Her hand and lead Her around the room. Show everyone that She's mine. That the most beautiful woman in the world belongs to me and no one else. I want to snatch Her up and shove Her in a closet. Keep Her far from the eyes of others. Keep Her only for myself. My eyes. My hands. My mouth. My cock.  
The tension that has been building in me for so long is reaching an explosion point. I want to lash out at everyone around me. Hurt them. Destroy them. Wipe the smiles off their faces. Show them the Pain of being away from Her.  
Soryu comes up behind me and pats me on the shoulder. He speaks in a low voice. "You're alright. She's here. You can talk to her. Don't fuck up now."  
I've been staring at Her since She walked in the door but She's been occupied with the other guests that have gone up to greet Her. There's a moment where She's alone and She looks up at me. She smiles at me. Her eyes are shining. She's stepping through the crowd of people and walking towards me.  
When She reaches me, She goes up on Her toes and presses a quick kiss to my lips. Her scent surrounds me. Perfume, makeup and Olivia's skin. Her arms go around me. She presses Her body against mine. She is warm and soft. She squeezes me in a hug and then lets go.  
I am frozen. Emotions are a tsunami inside of me. I fight to push them back down into their box. I reach for Her as She is moving away from the hug She has given me. I take her hand. My grip is probably too hard but She does not wince. She moves to stand next to me, Her hand still in mine. So close. Her arm brushing mine. Pressing against me. As close as possible.  
She looks up at me. She is smiling. Glowing. Sparkling. "I want to come home tonight."  
Things that have been frozen inside of me since She left melt. Time rushes forward. I can breathe. I can relax. I can see, feel and hear. Her absence is no longer separating me from the world.  
I can't take my eyes off of Her. She talks. She breathes. She smiles. She laughs. She lets go of my hand and goes to stand with her friends. She is near me. She will return home with me. Everything is falling into place.

My Love and my Possessiveness are constantly seething. They are an ever present fire in my blood. When She was away my need for Her was like a flood of needles in my veins. It is Very Simple. When I see Her, I need Her Closer. When She is Away, I need her Near. She is the Moon revolving around me. She makes the blood Flow in my veins the way the moon moves the tides on the Earth. Without her, my blood would Stop.  
I can Never get Enough.


	5. Home

_**Olivia**_

Mei and Sanjou's engagement party was full of beautiful people, delicious drinks and extravagant food, but the only thing I could think about was Eisuke. I'd been nervous about seeing him, afraid that he would be angry with me, but he was the same as always. Tall, handsome, cold and controlled. As soon as I saw him, I'd told him that I planned to return to the penthouse that night and he'd done nothing but hold my hand.  
I chose to take it as a sign that he wanted me to stay. Soryu and Sakiko had both told me that he wanted me back as soon as possible. I knew that it must have made him angry that I'd taken so long to come back to him, but he didn't frown or turn a cold shoulder to me. He held my hand, his fingers warm around mine. It was so very nice to be near to him again. We would talk in the penthouse after the party, and maybe he'd have harsh words for me. But for now, I was happier.  
I was breathing easier with every moment that passed, feeling myself relax now that I was near him. I stood with him for a while and then went to circulate around the crowds of guests, talking to my friends and meeting new people. His eyes were on me all the time. I could feel them every moment. It made my skin tingle with awareness. It made me excited.

"You look great!" I said to Chisato, so happy to see her again. I'd been worried about her and feeling guilty for leaving her in the penthouse right after she found out she was pregnant.  
"I feel great," she said with her usual soft smile. "It's so nice to get out of the penthouse and see some new faces."  
"How are you doing? Have you talked to Mamoru?" I asked. I wanted to ask her so many more questions, but it was going to have to wait until we could speak privately.  
"Not yet," she said. She glanced away and I followed her eyes to Mamoru. He was leaning against a wall in the shadow of a large plant, nursing a drink.  
"I'm back," I said. "I'm going back to the penthouse tonight. I'll be there for you whenever you need me. If you want me to, I'll help you talk to him."  
She shook her head. "I'll talk to him by myself, but it's good to know you're coming back. That way I can talk to you afterwards."  
"I'm sure you don't have to be so nervous," I said. "He's such a nice guy."  
"I know. Maybe that makes it harder. I don't want to ruin his life," she said, her voice sad.  
"_You won't be ruining his life,"_ I said firmly. "If you ask me, you'll be saving him. He needs a reason to get out of that chair and do something more with his life. He needs something to make him happy."  
She leaned in carefully and lowered her voice. "I do agree with you. I'm just not sure an unplanned baby with someone he isn't even dating is the thing to make him happy."  
It was painful to see how worried and unhappy she was. It'd probably been a mistake for her to put off talking to Mamoru. It had only given her time to build up an unreasonable amount of anxiety and fear. "It's going to be okay," I said. "I know it is. You're the type of person who always does her best. You'll get through this just fine."  
"Are you having trouble dealing with being in the penthouse, Chisato?" Sakiko said as she and Mei stepped up next to us. "It must be really hard."  
"Yes," Chisato said, taking up Sakiko's assumption and running with it. "It's hard, but I've got to get used to it. There's no telling how long it will last."  
"I know just how you feel to be trapped in that penthouse," Mei said. "It does have beautiful men there, but more than that it is boring."  
"Is Sanjou going to give you more freedom?" I asked Mei.  
"Ah, yes. I will be able to go to anywhere I please. I must only take my bodyguards with me. Sanjou will be the best husband," Mei said with a big smile. "He will give me so much freedom and he is so very good in bed."  
I didn't know whether to laugh or groan. Instead, I asked, "Have you started preparing for the wedding?"  
"Of course. I have chosen our new apartment. It is large and beautiful. We will also have the wedding at a Buddhist temple that is near to Sanjou's parents' house. Then we will have the reception here at the Tres Spades," Mei explained.  
"If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to the restroom," Chisato said, a little waver in her voice.  
I looked at her with concern. Of course, talk of a wedding would upset her. It hadn't been long since her fiance broke off their engagement and now she was pregnant without a stable relationship to rely on. I watched her thread her way through the crowd on her way out of the ballroom as Sakiko asked Mei when she'd be returning to Hong Kong.  
My eyes skipped from Chisato as she passed out of sight and landed on Eisuke. He was still watching me. Every time I looked at him, his eyes were on me. A throb of need passed through me, a pang of impatience. I wanted all of these people to disappear. I wanted to be alone with him, pressed against him in our bed, feeling him deep inside of me.  
But he was talking to Soryu and Sanjou and Mei was tugging on my arm, pulling my attention back to her. "Do you think you can come to Hong Kong soon? We will go shopping. There are so many wonderful shops. If my friends are there, my father will have to let me go out," Mei explained excitedly. "Especially now that I am to be married."  
"Well, I'm not sure," I said, not at all interested in visiting Mei in Hong Kong. "I'd have to talk to Eisuke about it. There's an issue right now. I'm not sure it's a good idea to travel."  
"That's right," Sakiko backed me up. "We're all under extra guard right now."  
"Oh? Sanjou did say that he may be assisting Eisuke with some problem," Mei said with a careless smile. "That is okay, then. We will just go shopping when I return to Tokyo. We will shop and then go to dinner. Sanjou took me to a place that serves delicious dim sum. I want to take you there."  
"Oh, that does sound good," I said, giving Sakiko a pointed look. If I was going to be spending time with Mei, she would have to go with me. "It'll be so much fun to go out, just the three of us."  
Mei answered, but I didn't hear her. My eyes had caught Chisato hurrying toward me through the crowd. She was utterly panicked, her face white with terror. I started running, feeling my heart plunge with worry for my friend.  
Before I reached her, Mamoru dashed past me and took her upper arms in his hands. I didn't catch what he said, but I was close enough to hear her reply. "Someone tried to kill me," she gasped, trying to keep her voice down as curious party-goers cast glances at her. "This blood isn't mine."  
Her words sent a chill through me. I looked around instinctively for Eisuke. He and Soryu were already on their way over to us. I moved closer to Chisato, we all did, using our bodies to block her from sight, looking around for potential threats.  
"Someone attacked her," Mamoru explained to Eisuke and Soryu.  
"In the hall," Chisato said, she was shaking and tears began streaming down her face. "He forced me into a room."  
"We've got to get her out of here," I said, but Eisuke, Soryu and Mamoru had already begun moving like a well-oiled machine.  
Eisuke grabbed my hand and pulled me in front of him, holding me close against his chest, using his body as a shield. Mamoru was doing the same with Chisato. Sakiko was suddenly with us, ducking into the protection of Soryu's arms as we moved through the ballroom in a tight group. Baba, Ota and two guards joined as we stepped through the double doors into the hallway.  
"What did he look like?" Soryu asked. He had his phone pressed to his ear, alerting security that there was an intruder in the hotel.  
I looked over at Chisato and realized that she was really freaking out. Her entire body was quaking as she struggled to answer Soryu's question. "I don't know... He was wearing a suit... He had short hair..."  
"Do you remember what color his tie was?" Mamoru asked, his voice calm and soothing.  
"B-blue," Chisato said. She was fighting hard to bring herself under control, but she couldn't hold back a sob. "I hit him in the nose. There should be blood and swelling."  
I stepped towards her, wanting to pull her into a hug and comfort her, but Eisuke's hands gripped my arms hard and pulled me back into his chest. It was then that I realized that we were all in danger. The men weren't just trying to protect Chisato.  
As we reached the penthouse elevator and waited for it to arrive, I relaxed back into Eisuke's chest and put a hand back to caress his hip. A wave of gratitude and love washed through me. One of his arms came up to wrap around me, holding me tightly to him. I'd missed him, his presence and his unyielding strength, but I hadn't realized how much. I'd been focused on myself when I was away, caught up in my own issues. Now, his nearness, the fact that I was back in his arms, was a rightness so strong it was painful.

"What happened?" Soryu asked. Everyone had gathered around Chisato as she sat on an ottoman in the penthouse.  
"I went out to go to the restroom. There was a man in the hallway. He grabbed me and forced me into a room," Chisato explained. She was still shaking. "He had a syringe. He was going to inject me with some sort of poison…"  
"_Shit,"_ Mamoru said under his breath. I turned to look at him, he'd backed away from Chisato and was standing behind everyone else as we all focused our attention on her. Soryu continued questioning her about the attack.  
"_She needs to see a doctor!"_ I said, suddenly remembering the baby.  
"Did you get hurt anywhere?" Soryu asked, looking down at Chisato carefully. "Is _any_ of that blood yours? Are you certain that the needle didn't touch you at all?"  
"No," Chisato said. "I don't need a doctor. I didn't get hurt."  
"_She's had a major shock. She __has_ _to see a doctor," _I insisted, pulling on Eisuke's arm and looking desperately up at him. A moment later understanding flashed through his eyes and his mouth tightened.  
"_Everyone out,"_ he said, raising his voice in command. "Everyone get on the elevator. We're going downstairs, _now_." His voice softened as he looked down at a confused Chisato. "You stay here, we're just going to have a meeting downstairs. Everything is going to be okay." He looked back up and pointed a finger at Mamoru, his voice turning harsh. "And _you._ You stay with Chisato and get the doctor up here."

We ended up in a meeting room on the third floor, sitting around the long table in our fancy clothes, looking like we'd shown up overdressed to watch a powerpoint presentation. Baba, Ota and Eisuke were taking guesses as to how Chisato's attacker got into the venue while Soryu made phone calls. Sakiko and I sat in a corner by ourselves, watching the men.  
"What was that about back in the penthouse?" Sakiko whispered. "Eisuke seemed pissed at Mamoru all of sudden."  
With a sigh, I decided to tell the truth. Chisato had probably confessed to Mamoru already. There was no way to continue keeping her secret when a doctor was on the way upstairs. "She's pregnant," I whispered back. "And the baby's Mamoru's. Eisuke just figured it out."  
"What the hell? Chisato and Mamoru?" Sakiko shook her head, her eyes bright with the high of new gossip. "Did Mamoru not know? He wasn't exactly acting right…"  
I shook my head. "No, he didn't know. She's been worried about telling him."  
She gave me a look of disbelief, one that I completely understood. Mamoru was a sweetheart. Who would be afraid to tell him anything? But before she could comment, Soryu finished a phone call and made an announcement.  
"Okay, Yamashita was at her apartment, she'll be here as soon as she can. Fujitani's a few subway stops away, he's going to catch a taxi," Soryu said.  
I looked at Sakiko, wondering if she and I were going to be stuck in the meeting room all night while the men made plans. Sakiko understood my concerns as soon as my eyes met hers. "Hey," she said, as fearless as ever. "Can Olivia and I go back to my apartment? Or Ice Dragons headquarters if you think that'd be safer? We don't want to sit in this room all night."  
Eisuke levelled a scorching look at me that said he'd like to put me in a cage and throw away the key. "Olivia isn't going anywhere."  
Before either Sakiko or I could answer, the fire alarm went off. Sakiko and I jumped up quickly. Fire drills never happened in the hotel because the guests couldn't be distrubed, but management loved to have them in the dorms to keep employees on their toes. Eisuke and the guys stood up slower, looking at each other with questions in their eyes.  
"What do we do?" Soryu asked. "Is there an actual fire in the hotel, or is someone trying to flush us out?"  
He raised his phone up to make a call - probably to find an answer to his question - but it began ringing before he could dial. "Oh," he said his last name to identify himself instead of the usual hello. A moment later he was waving his hands, ushering all of us out of the room.  
Eisuke was at my side in an instant, gripping my hand and pulling me close to him. "You stay right next to me. Do you understand?" he asked. I didn't bother to answer, instead I squeezed his hand tight and hurried with him out of the room.

The third floor hallway was empty by the time we stepped out into. It was mainly offices, and this late at night few employees would have been working. Any that were there would have evacuated immediately. The emergency stairwell nearest to the meeting room was a different matter entirely. It was full of guests swarming down to the first floor.  
I turned around to look behind Eisuke, trying to see if everyone in our group was together before we stepped into the flow of people on the stairs. Just as I did, a _Boom!_ filled the air and the stairwell echoed with screams.  
Eisuke's arms immediately came around me and he pushed us into the crowd on the stairs. It was suffocating and scary to be packed in with so many people, many of whom were in a panic, but it didn't last long. We only had to go down two flights before we stepped out on the lawn into the cold winter air.  
Outside, people were yelling, "Get away! Get away! Get away from the hotel!" Eisuke hurried us across the grass before we both turned to look up. The top of the hotel was on fire.  
"_That's the penthouse!"_ I yelled, suddenly terrified. "_Chisato and Mamoru are up there! And the staff!"  
_ Eisuke was frozen, his eyes staring at the fire that was destroying our home. I couldn't see his eyes because they were raised to the sky, but just the tension in his jawline was enough to send chills through me that were far stronger than those caused by the frigid temperature. When he finally looked back down at me, he'd regained control of himself. His eyes were as unreadable as usual and his face was relaxed.  
"Come on," he said, shrugging out of his tuxedo jacket and holding it out for me to put on. "Everyone in the penthouse heard the same fire alarm that we did. They had time to get out before that explosion went off. Now, let's hurry. We have a meeting point to get to."  
"An explosion?" I asked as I slipped my arms into his jacket. "Someone planted a bomb in the penthouse?"  
"We won't know what happened for a while," he said, putting an arm around me and urging me forward. "Let's go."  
We started off around the hotel and I watched the guests on the lawn as we passed them. They were scared but safe, shivering in the winter night, staring up at the fire on top of the hotel. Employees were rushing around, some with megaphones, trying to get everyone organized.  
There was a plan for this. I knew it. It was a plan that no one ever thought we'd have to use. I looked up at Eisuke, "Shouldn't we be helping?" I asked. "We have to take care of the guests and get them to other hotels."  
"We have other things to do," he said. "The guests will be taken care of."  
Eisuke's phone began to ring as we approached the small guard shack that sat at the entrance to the private underground garage. Baba and Ota were already there, Soryu and Sakiko were right behind us.  
We stood quietly, watching Eisuke as he held the phone to his ear, mostly listening to whatever the person on the other line had to say. "The guards set off the alarm because a suspicious helicopter was headed for the hotel," he said when the call was finished. "It must have dropped a bomb. As far as they know, everyone got out of the penthouse safely."  
We all turned to look at the huge fire that was raging above us.  
"This had to have been Shin Aida," Baba said what we were all thinking. "There's no one else with the power and the balls to do this."  
I turned as I heard a car coming out of the underground garage. It was a black Toyota. Chisato and Mamoru sat in the front seats. I waved at Chisato as the car passed and she waved back. It felt like a dream. "They're safe," I said, looking up at Eisuke. "Where are they going?"  
"To a safehouse," he answered. "And that's where we'll be going. Baba, go get us a van."  
"Sure thing," Baba said and disappeared down into the parking garage. While he was gone, Tomoko Yamashita ran up to join us. The first thing she did was ask if everyone was okay, Soryu began filling her in on the details.  
"Yamashita, find out where Fujitani is. If he isn't close have him get out of the taxi and wait for us. We're leaving in the next two minutes," Eisuke said.  
Baba pulled up in a huge black van and we piled in, driving away from the hotel just as the rescue vehicles began arriving. I was sitting in the seat just behind the driver with Eisuke, his face was turned towards the window, watching the hotel as we drove away. I reached for his hand and held it tightly, trying to give him silent comfort. He may own Tres Spades hotels all over the world, but the one in Tokyo was special to him.  
He'd fought hard to get the laws changed so that he could build a hotel and casino in his country of birth. He'd made that hotel his home and lived there with the friends that he thought of as family. He'd lived there with _me_. Our home and all of our possessions were probably long gone. I knew that he had to be hurting, even if he refused to show it.  
I pressed close and brought my lips to his ear to whisper quietly. "I've spent weeks thinking about our relationship. If there's anything I'm sure of it's that there's only one thing in this world that I need, and that's you."  
He turned to look at me and for a moment his eyes were unguarded. They were burning with love for me, burning with an intensity that robbed me of my breath, love bordering on obsession, threatening to swallow me whole. His eyelids fell, hiding his eyes as he bent down to kiss me. The kiss was controlled, his lips pressed and tugged at mine with only a hint of tongue, but it spoke of his love and his need, the happiness he felt at having me back  
It was painful, that kiss. I'd been away from him for too long. The feel and the taste of him made my heart twist in my chest. Every cell in my body burned with the joy of tasting him again and ached for more. Our lips parted all too soon, the van was filled with other people, after all. I dropped my forehead to his upper arm, tormented by my need to validate our love with physical contact, hiding the tears that sprang to my eyes.  
He pulled me closer, wrapping his arm around me and tucking me against his chest. He joined in the conversation as everyone began to share their thoughts about the two attacks. I wondered if he could feel the tears that fell on his shirt. If he could, did he assume they were caused by the emotions of the terrible night, or did he know that I couldn't stop them because I was so happy and grateful to be back in his arms that I felt like I could die?

It took us over an hour to get to the safehouse. It was a huge house, maybe it would even qualify as a mansion. I had no idea where it was located. I'd fallen asleep not long after we left the hotel as Tomoko and the men discussed possible strategies for dealing with Shin Aida.  
"Are there just a bunch of mansions sitting around empty waiting for a time of trouble?" I asked, as we filed into the house.  
"All of the vehicles have directions to different safehouses in them," Fujitani explained. "Because we were in a big van, we get a big house with plenty of bedrooms."  
"I'm going to go upstairs and find a place to sleep," Sakiko said. She hadn't been able to sleep in the van.  
"Let me walk you up there," Soryu offered. "That way I'll know where to find you when we're finished."  
I looked over at Eisuke, but he answered my question before I had a chance to open my mouth. "You'll stay here. I don't want you out of my sight."  
Everyone else began exploring the first floor of the house. Apparently, it really was a safehouse. None of the others had ever been in it before or were aware of its location. They had to look around to figure out the layout and what the house had to offer.  
"There's a war room back here," Ota called, and we all went to join him in a large room at the back of the house. There were whiteboards on the walls, flipcharts, a huge table surrounded by chairs and couches along the perimeter.  
Baba went straight for a coffee pot and started brewing coffee. Fujitani opened a large cabinet and began pulling out laptops, notebooks, pens and markers. I found a pillow and a blanket in a trunk between two of the couches and curled up in the corner of a couch to go to sleep.  
The night was long. I woke up many times, usually when Tomoko and Eisuke were shouting at each other because she felt something that Eisuke wanted to do was too dangerous. Each time I woke up the faces of the people surrounding the table were more tired and more strained.  
I knew that they'd been examining and debating different plans for dealing with Shin Aida since Chisato's apartment was broken into and destroyed. They'd spent weeks thinking of this problem from every possible angle, but now things had changed and they had to look for a new solution. They had to find new angles that they'd never even imagined before.  
I woke around dawn to find that Sanjou and a few other employees had joined them. Fujitani noticed that I was awake and walked over to me with a smile. "How are you doing?"  
"I'm alright," I said, pushing myself into a sitting position. My body was aching from sleeping on the couch. "How's the meeting going?"  
"It looks like we may have come up with a solution. It's going to take a lot of work and we have to move fast, but if things work out the way we think, it will pay off in the end," he said.  
"A lot of work?" I asked. "When are you guys supposed to sleep?"  
"We're going to take a break for a few hours of sleep just as soon as we've briefed Sanjou and the relief team and gotten some things rolling," he explained. "Are you hungry? Baba made a convenience store run. There's bento and donuts and some drinks."  
I went over to the side table and got a donut and a carton of milk. I wasn't going to drink coffee if I was going to be able to go to bed with Eisuke soon. I wanted nothing more than to be snuggled under some blankets with him, holding him close as we fell asleep together.  
I nibbled on my donut as I looked around the room. Eisuke was sitting at the far end of the long table, deep in discussion with Sanjou. He'd taken off his tuxedo jacket and tie and unbuttoned his vest. His hair was mussed and I could see the tiredness in his eyes, but there was also a burning determination to tackle the issues at hand and come out on top.  
He took my breath away. He was strength and power, focus and drive. It was painful to look at him, to know that I'd walked out on him. I'd been selfish, wrapped up in my own insecurities, weak and cowardly, _fucking flailing_ for a bit of power, for an answer, for a solution. I'd run from him when I knew how much he needed me. I'd turned my back on his feelings and thrown myself a little pity party. I'd fucked Sakiko for God's sake. I'd been grasping...grasping for independence and self-confidence, but I couldn't find those things if I was hiding, running, far from the place that I needed to be. I belonged at his side. That was the only place that I would ever find anything meaningful.  
I looked around the room. Tomoko was standing in front of a note covered flipchart, briefing the newcomers on the decisions made during the night. Soryu, Ota and Fujitani were on burner phones, making arrangements. We'd all had to hand our cell phones over to Fujitani in the van on the way to the safehouse. He'd carefully destroyed each and every one of them, so that there was no way we could be tracked. There'd been a box of burner phones in the supply closet along with paper clips and dry erase markers. Baba was sitting behind a laptop, typing furiously, as if his life depended on it.  
I was eating a donut. I'd been sleeping, first in the van and then on the couch, all night long. I hadn't contributed a single thing, and this was the problem, the real issue. The thing that made me feel like I was constantly banging my head against a wall, constantly on the outside, insignificant and inconsequential. This was the thing that was going to have to end.  
I could no longer stay on the periphery of Eisuke's life, a toy that he kept high on a shelf and only took down when he had time to play. I was going to have to become a part of things, a part of both The Ichinomiya Group and Ichinomiya Underground. I would have to learn as much as I could and take an active role. Eisuke wasn't the sort of man who left work behind at the end of the day. He wasn't even the sort of man who was overly obsessed with this job. His position was who he was. There was no separating the two. He was the CEO and The Boss. Every moment of every day.  
This is what Soryu should have been saying when he was talking to me about being the ane-san. He'd focused on the power at my fingertips, the ability to order people around and get my way. He'd gotten it all wrong. He'd focused on the fact that his grandmother held power, but not the true reason for that power. If she was having men killed with a look, it wasn't because they were too slow to bring her a cup of tea. It was because she knew what was going on in the Triad and she wasn't afraid to take action. She was a boss in her own right, and that was exactly where I needed to end up, standing at Eisuke's side as an equal partner, supporting him and fully sharing his life.  
Across from me, Soryu closed the call on his phone and reached for the legal pad in front of him. I dropped the donut I was holding and stepped over to him, putting my hand on his shoulder. "Give me something to do," I said, making sure the words were a command, not a request.  
He didn't hesitate. He scanned through a couple of pages of notes in his legal pad and drew a box around a portion of writing. He reached into the center of the table, snagged an extra laptop and sat it in front of me. "We're going public with the things that Shin Aida has been doing. We're arranging a media blitz so big that he won't be able to stop it," he explained. "We're going to ask Chisato to do a live interview, explaining how she came across Shin Aida's secrets and what he's done to retaliate. I want you to make a list of the things that you think are most important for Chisato to say. If you were sitting at home watching this breaking news story, what would you find the most important and the most compelling? What would push you to the point that you'd be ready to march in the streets to get Aida taken into custody? We need to make sure the interviewer asks the right questions."  
"I can do that," I said, and pulled the laptop closer.

"Eisuke, wait," I said. He'd leaned back against the door of the master bedroom just as soon as it had closed and pulled me into his arms. His hands on me were strong and demanding, running up my back and tangling in my hair. He was devouring me with a reckless hunger, his tongue exploring my mouth with a dark and primitive need to reclaim all that was his.  
I was breathless and trembling, already aching with need, but I had to be responsible. I wrenched my lips away from his for a second time. "_Wait,"_ I said again. His mouth had moved immediately to my neck when I pulled my lips from his. He tugged roughly on my hair, pulling my head back to expose my throat, his tongue licking hot over my skin, sending shivers down my spine. "_You need to sleep."  
_ "I need to be inside of you," he said, his hands dropping down to caress over my thighs before they skimmed up under my dress and over my stomach.  
I cried out, arching up toward him, my entire body tensing as I strained to be near him. I'd been aware of him all night and now I was far too aroused. I clenched my fists in the material of his shirt and pressed kisses into his hair as his tongue played over my collar bone. He smelled of stress, sweat and stale cologne, but underneath that was the warm scent of his skin, the smell of home, safety and love.  
"Then do it now," I said, no longer worried about sleep. "I can't wait anymore."  
He guided me over to the bed and pushed me down on the end of it. My legs dangled over the side and he reached up under my dress to pull my panties off. His movements were fast, nearly violent, they resounded inside of me. We were both desperate to fuck each other, to reaffirm our connection. I dug my hands into the bedspread, raised my legs and spread my them, inviting him in. My dress had slid up to the top of my thighs, he pushed it up to my waist as he stepped between my legs.  
"_Olivia,"_ he said suddenly, his voice harsh. "_What did you do?"_  
I looked up at him in confusion and then down at my body as realization dawned. "_Shit. I totally forgot,"_ I said, feeling disappointed. I looked up at him. "You said if I left you, you'd have your name tattooed on me. I went ahead and did it for you."  
This wasn't how I'd wanted things to go. I'd imagined a sexy reveal of my new tattoo a hundred times. I couldn't believe that I'd forgotten all about it. I could blame the tragic night and my passion-clouded mind, but it didn't make up for the fact that I'd lost the opportunity to present it to him like a gift rather than what seemed to have been a jarring surprise.  
"I wasn't serious," he said, his voice harsh. His eyes hadn't stopped staring at the tattoo. "It had to have hurt. Why did you do it?"  
He reached out to skim his thumb over his name, it was written in English in a pretty script just above my slit. I couldn't stop the shudder of pleasure that went through me when he touched me.  
"You're angry," I said. "I thought you'd like it."  
He shook his head. "Someone saw you here, someone touched you. _Why?"_  
"It was a woman. The best female tattoo artist in Japan. She wasn't worried about looking at my body," I said, feeling defensive. "I did it because I wanted to. Ever since you mentioned it, I've wanted your name on me. _I belong to you."_  
I rolled over onto my stomach and pulled my dress up further to reveal that I'd gotten not one, but two tattoos. His name was written in Kanji in the small of my back, his favorite spot. His breath hissed between his teeth, followed by the rustling sound of him kneeling down on the floor behind me. His fingertips and then his lips caressed over the symbols drawn indelibly on my skin, sending shivers up my spine and making my breath catch in my throat.  
"I like it," he said, his voice low and husky. "I like my name on you, but you'd better not let anyone touch you ever again. Someone saw your body and hurt you and I wasn't there to protect you. Don't you ever let that happen again."  
His touch and his breath skimming hot over my skin made my blood boil. I squirmed until he moved away and let me roll over onto my back. He followed me closely, kneeling between my spread legs, his fingers caressing the outer lips of my pussy while his tongue licked over his name. I moaned and pushed myself towards him. He was tormenting me, his fingers and thumb spread wide, massaging circles up and down the smooth flesh of my outer lips, while my slit lay open, swollen, dripping, begging for his touch.  
He stood up off the floor and his hands went to his belt, quickly undoing it and unfastening his pants. I watched, staring greedily at the bulge in his boxers, but his hand moved back to my body, his fingertips sliding over the tattoo. "You leave me and then you return with my name on you. You say that you belong to me, but you walk out when it suits you," he said. He looked down at the tattoo and then back up to meet my gaze. His eyes were hot and dark, there were storms brewing inside of him. "_This makes me want to tear you up."_  
"_Do it,"_ I said, my voice commanding.  
He freed his cock and held it in his fist. The sight of it sent tremors of desire through me. He rubbed the head from the bottom of my slit to the top, gliding through my wetness, drawing a cry out of me as it bumped over my clit, before he reversed its path and found my entrance. His eyes locked on mine as he began pushing himself inside of me. The expression on his face was fierce, the light in his eyes nearly bloodthirsty. He hooked his hands beneath my knees and pulled my legs up, raising my hips off the bed, preparing to plunder me.  
I reached up, gripping handfuls of his shirt and pulling hard. I wished that I was stronger, strong enough to pop the buttons off the fabric and rip open the undershirt that lay beneath, destroying the layers that separated me from his skin. Instead I used my hold on him as leverage, pulling and pushing my body towards him, accepting his first hard thrust with a powerful forward movement of my own.  
The feel of him sliced through me. He was inside of me. I had returned to where I belonged. The pain was back, a keening cry from my soul, the pleasure so intense that it burned, as if every cell in my body was straining towards him trying to absorb his nearness, his essence. I needed him like water, like air, like a nutrient that I couldn't survive without. Like a drug, I was addicted to him. I dropped my hands down to fist them in the bedspread, seeking a stronger purchase. I wanted to meet his every deep plunge with a thrust of my own, to take him, claim him, ravage him, just as he was doing to me.  
I moved in rhythm with him, feeling like I wanted to burst out of my skin. I wanted to throw myself against him, into him. I couldn't get close enough, I wanted to disappear inside of him. I forgot where we were and about the people that filled the house. There was only Eisuke and I and the point where are bodies connected was the center of the universe. I shouted my need and screamed my pleasure. I gripped the blankets beneath me and propelled myself toward him, meeting his every thrust, gobbling up his cock, wanting more, deeper, harder, faster. Feeling his cock moving back and forth against the swollen, sensitive walls of my pussy, building pleasure ever higher. I flew past one orgasm after another, not slowing down or hesitating, flinging my body into his, begging with my flesh for one more deep plunge after another.  
He was rough, near violent, fucking me with all of his strength, our bodies crashing together. I was on fire, my skin slick with sweat and burning up beneath my white dress. I hated it. I wanted it off but there was no time. I couldn't stop fucking him for the few seconds it would take to pull it off and toss it to the side. He let go of one of my legs and his free hand came down on the bed next to my head, propping himself up as he stared down at me. I looked up at him through eyes clouded with tears. He was dripping sweat, huffing air in and out and letting out growling groans as he thrust his cock relentlessly hard and deep into my body.  
He bent low, putting his mouth near my ear and said, "_You're mine, you're mine, you're mine, you're mine, you're mine. You're fucking mine."_ Punctuating each brutal plunge with a reminder that I belonged to him.  
"_Fucking yes, I'm yours,"_ I said, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and fisting my hands into his dress shirt, holding on with all of my might. I wrapped my free leg around his waist, using the leverage to rock myself into his thrusts, out of control and determined to fuck him until I couldn't move.  
I was trying to fill the emptiness that had consumed me while I was away. Emptiness that I'd tried to ignore or interpret as angst and anger. But I needed him. I couldn't be okay without him. He was a heartless bastard, a complete dick when it came to respecting my feelings, but I had to have him. I had to have all of it. I wanted his thoughtless cruelty scraping against my heart, his cold shoulder pushing me back and forcing me to try harder to win his attention. It hurt me, it overwhelmed me and sometimes it made me want to run, but I couldn't really be alive without it. We were both a little insane, obsessive and dysfunctional. We were perfect together.  
He suddenly dropped the leg that he'd still been holding and wrapped his arms around me, lifting me up and tossing me further up on the bed. For a moment it crossed my mind that this was a chance to take off my dress, but he was over me and back inside of me before I could even begin to move. My dress was super short, but the sleeves were long. The neck was wide, exposing my collarbone, but high, showing not even a hint of cleavage. Eisuke pushed the neckline to the side, so that he could pull it down over my left shoulder and expose my breast. He yanked the silky fabric of my bra away and slipped his fingers over the curves of my sweat soaked skin. He squeezed his handful of my flesh, roughly, pinching my nipple hard, tugging painfully. There was no sign of his typical coolheaded ultra-practiced moves. There was only his desperate need to own me.  
His aggressive touch sent electricity through my veins, arching my back with pleasure/pain, sweeping me into another orgasm, bouncing high-pitched screams off the walls. I pushed my hips up to meet his thrusts, but I was growing weaker, losing strength. I sobbed in frustration. I never wanted this to end. It felt far too good to be back in his arms, to have him inside of me, to be making love to him again. I wanted it to go on forever.  
He pulled out and I looked up to see him kneeling between my thighs with his cock in hand, his face contorted with passion. I watched thick white cum spurt out and fall onto my skin, spattering over my pussy, covering his name. I spasmed with pleasure as the liquid heat splashed across my skin, marking me as his. How many times had he done this? Especially in the beginning, he would do it and walk away without a word.  
Now he waited for me to meet his burning eyes and said, "_Olivia. Don't ever leave me again. Do you understand? I won't tolerate it. No matter where you go or what you say, I'll drag you back. My name is on you. You're mine forever. I'll never let you go."_ With that, he fell upon me, wrapping his arms around me, tangling our legs together and kissing me as if he were hunting for my soul.  
Some time later I wrenched my lips from his, gasping for air, searching for sanity before I completely lost myself. I lay my cheek against his and breathed into his ear, "_I love you. I love you. I love you…"_ His precious skin was against mine. His strong body lay in my arms, but he was just as fragile as I was. I knew that. It was why he guarded himself so ferociously, because deep inside was a heart of glass. I tightened my arms around him. I couldn't let myself lose sight of that, even when he threw up countless blinds and distractions. His heart was mine, and it was my job to protect it.


End file.
